A child is in the grocery checkout with their parents. It sees the candy display and asks for a pack of Reese's. When the parents do not grant the child's request, they begin to scream and cry. When they arrive home, the child is beaten with a copper rod. The new puppy that the child got for a birthday present is hanged and fed to buzzards.

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What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Chuck Norris' cheese

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a seal walks into a bar. replace "bar" with "club". and replace "walks into" with "gets bludgeon by."

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why did the pirate not get in to the pirate movie it was rated arrrrrr

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How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? It should only take one person to do this job regardless of hair color.

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Doctor: your mom has cancerous aids Me:*sob*

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GEORGE LOPEZ SUCKS

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How do dinosaurs pay their bills? They don’t, dinosaurs don’t have a capital system.

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A black person and a hispanic person are in a car, who is driving? The black person, after all it's his car.

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A black man walks up to the cashier with twenty buckets of KFC and seventeen gallons of grape Kool - Aid. The cashier says, "Do you want a bag for those?"

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There once was a man from Nantucket, Whose body parts were all adequate and thus could not perform any odd sexual acts upon himself.

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Q: You know what's better and funnier than reading all these jokes A: GLEE and thats like singing and dancing :p JK it HAPPy tree friends LOOK IT UPPP!!!

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue I'm really drunk so show me your boobss.

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Why can't Billy ride the bicycle? Billy's a fish.

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What is the difference between assault and aggravated assault? Aggravated assault is aggravated, whereas assault is aggravated.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? A Pokemon pencil!!! A Pokemon pencil who? I just found a Pokemon pencil next to my computer when I was playing pokemon!!! LMFAO!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To try and beat the oncoming car.

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There once was an X from place B, Who satisfied predicate P, Then X did thing A, In a specified way, Resulting in circumstance C.

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Why did the black guy drown in the river?? unfortunately he owed 10,000 dollars to a loan shark and couldnt pay his dues So he was tied to an anchor and put in the river.

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69, hahaha

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69

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because it was a hammer.

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poop

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whats blue and fluffy? your mothers chest hair!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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