Whats green and gets you really high? A green airplane

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Well, its allright then, just tired that is all, leave it be, I mean what if your wife sees it? What will she think?

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Q: What did the vomiting man say to his friend? A: BLEEEAAARRRGGHH! Q: What did the vomiting man say to his wife? A: BLAAAARRRRRGGGHHH!!! Q: What did the vomiting man say to the waiter in the restaurant? A: BLAAAAAARGH! Q: What did the vomiting man say to Leonardo DiCaprio? A: BLEEEEAAAARRGH! Q: What did the vomiting man say to the convenience store clerk? A: BLAAAAAARRRGGGGHHHH! Q: What did the vomiting man say to your mom? A: BLAAAARRRGGGHH!!!! Q: What did the vomiting man say to Barack Obama? A: BLAAAARRRRRGGHHHH!! Q; What did the vomiting man say to the King of Saudi Arabia? A: BLAAAAAAAAAAAEEEAAARRGH! Q: What did the vomiting man say to the bartender? A: BLLLEEEEAAAARRGHHHH!!! Q: What did the vomiting man say to the funeral home director? A: BLLLEEEAAAARRRGGGHHH!!

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? Because she was blind.

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What do you call a cow painted in red a cat ( PS : i lied about the cow + the paint ! )

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What did the boyfriend ask his girlfriend for on his birthday? Pokemon Yellow version.

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I was taking a major shiit in the bathroom stalls at the college and someone walked in on me, talk about awkward

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What happened when a star exploded? It killed billions of other sentient beings.

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what do you call cheese thats not yours? stolen, your under arrest

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A black duck walks into a bar. Duck: "I'll have a beer." Bartender: " How you paying for that?" Duck: "Put it on the tax payers."

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What would happen if Obama got reelected? The economy would turn to shit.

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what did old retarded autistic ginger kid get for his birthday? i dont know thats why i asked

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What's sad about a guy jumping off a cliff? The cliff.

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Yo mommas teeth are so yellow that.....I reccomend she see a dentist.

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like most people my age. im 27

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What's John Lennon doing these days? Decomposing.

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a girl had just gotten dumped by her boyfriend over a text message. she got very sad and became suicidal

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My neighbours found out this morning that I'm a serial killer. Knock knock [L]

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Why is the sky blue? You like men.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: To get to the other side

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? Because the farmer caught it.

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tiger woods played golf against peyton manning and yet tiger still cant win.

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What did the black man say when he jumped in the pool? The water's nice, you should join me.

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Why was the blonde on the train tracks? Because she was tied up by a madman on crack.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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