What is green, red, and goes 70 mph? A frog in a blender

Roses are red, Violets are brown, F*** who's had a shit in my garden.

Joker: Knock knock Batman: Who's there Joker: Not your parents

What did the muslim do at the airport? He bought a ticket to New York and proceeded to fly there to mourn his brother who was killed during the terrorist attacks on 9/11.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got hit by a truck.

Why did the orphans kill timmy? timmy said a your mom joke.

A Muslim walks into a bar, and has a pint of lager because he has chosen to integrate into his host country's culture. He then leaves without incident.

What do you call a dog with two tails? ...Depends what its name is.

When were in a zombie apocalypse I will make sure to save you for 40 days and then I will sacrifice you

what is black and green and rainy all over? the democratic republic of congo

whats worse than having ants in your pants? getting sotomized by a lightsaber

Roses are red Violets are blue Some roses are white 72.4% of Americans are too

What do you call a person who is deaf. It doesn't matter, they wont be able to hear it when you call them.

what do you use to blindfold chinese person? dental floss!!

1,000 people get out of a plane , who hits the ground first? The DEAD guy!!!!

What's worse than an asian driver? A blindfolded asian driver.

what do you call an octopus with 9 tentacles? a male octopus

Why did the black cop pull the white guy over? He was going approximately 52 miles per hour on a 40 miles per hour speed limited road.

How did the hillbilly fix his PC? He brought it to Wal-Mart and got a diagnostics from an expert then installed anti virus software.

What did the lawyer say to the doctor? - I am a lawyer and you're a doctor.

What do you call a Caucasian in Russia? Russian.

Q) What did the cowboy say to the astronaut? A) Howdy.

Sonny Bono walked into a bar. No, wait, he crashed into a tree.

whats the best kind of chocolate bar? a larsbar

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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