How do you tell the difference between a bomb and an Asian? One blows up.

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A middle-class family went away on vacation. While they were gone, a pyromaniac burnt down their house. Their cat was still inside.

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Did you hear about the guys who wanted to go to Hawaii??? They didn't go!

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How are cars made? By magic.

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why is six afraid of seven? because seven is a jew!

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What did the blue man say to the red lady? Do you want to make purple? -A.M.M

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what did the crocodile say to the fish? OMNOMNOMNOMNOM!! and then the fish swam away because of the the weird noise the crock was making...

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Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo.

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Why did Billy fail his math quiz? Because he's stupid.

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Why did the cat throw up on the couch? because it was nauseous!

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Okay, but cut me some slack here, its not as straight forward as it sounds, I got at least twice as many active synapses as other people do, that means twice the thought process, in video games I can for example remember twice the commands, and such. Sadly this does not mean that I can think twice as fast or twice as smart, but rather that I do so involuntarily in short spans, until I burn myself out. So be a bit nice to me, when I say that I have since I was a kid used about 2.5-7.5 mg valium, this is just because my thought process works so fast I burn out because well, I got the processor, but it burns out, excuse me my wife needs some help with her cellphone, see you soon

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Why do black people enjoy watermelon? Because it tastes good.

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What's white and bobs up and down in a babies crib? A pedophiles ass.

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What's wrong with the axe murderer that lives down the street?? Nothing.

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Guess what I did to the clown I hit it with an axe

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What happens when you cross a vampire and a werewolf? A cross between a vampire and a werewolf.

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i have to tell you a knock knock joke. but you have have to start it..

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Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? He was hit by a truck.

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What's do a woman's vagina and a camel's toe have in common? Other than being parts of two mammals, they have nothing in common.

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How many Jews can you fit in a car? I don't know it really depends on the car, usually about 2 in the front, 3 in the back and... That's about it

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Why did Bert go to the doctor? He had an appointment.

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Life gave me onions. Onionaide Sucks

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I was (really) asked one day by a guy if I wanted to star in a porn movie... Before I could even think about it he asked my 14 year old sister "Do you want to join in too?" And that kids, is why I am stuck in jail for pushing up a boot up a guys ass... Well replace boot with dick, and guys ass with my 14 year old sister and yeah... Naw... seriously she has hueg boobs though... at the age of 14, damn those melons have not even gone a bit greenish yellow and they are still growing... ...Hey Cassandra, its NeroMetal, good thing I am not your brother and that you are 19 right? NOT TO BE CONFUSED WITH THAT NEROISM DUDE THAT CHATS HERE, I play videogames, and write books, and sign books... ...Then some guy sees my real name is Nero and goes that guy on horsehead network? Who? HE SUCKS! SUCKS ASS!

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Justin's humor

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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