What happens when you cross a starfish with a dog? Dogs and starfish are from a different phylum. They are genetically incompatible.

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How many mexicans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Trick question they cant afford one.

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a white kid is called on by his teacher he is promptly sent to the principle's office after not complying.

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Joe Paterno walks into a police station.

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Why did the homeless man kill his dog? Because a drunk rich guy said he'd pay him a hundred dollars if he did.

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What's black, white, has green stripes and smells like eggs? I don't know. That's why I'm asking.

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Once there was an ugly barnacle. He was so ugly that everyone died. The end.

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Knock Knock Whose there? Boo I don't know anyone by the name of Boo. Go away

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What did one dog say to the other dog? Woof woof

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Why do people like anti jokes? Because their f****** funny as hell

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1. Why did sally fall of the swing? -because she had no arms. 2.Knock Knock -Who's there? Not sally.

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Who's black, white and Asian at the same time? A panda.

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What do you do when you walk downstairs and see your TV floating? Call Ghostbusters.

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1Q: Quick! Ask me if I'm a lemon!! 2A: Your not a lemon 1A: :/ oh :/

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If life gives you lemons ask where they came from.

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why did the homeless man buy a mansion? he didn't. i lied. he would need a job to be able to buy a mansion.

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Why did the woman cross the road? She didn't. They are no roads in the kitchen.

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? The chicken had no legs and was therefore incapable of committing to such a challenge.

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whats black and white and slides on its belly a penguin

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Why did the black guy jump over the fence ? The holocost.

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What is red white and blue Blood. I was lying about the white and blue.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm a paranoid schizophrenic and so am i

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This one time at band camp... I played an instrument and learned to march with the rest of my school's band.

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Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?". The operator says "Calm down. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence, then the man said "he has a pulse". The operator then calmly stated "we are sending a helicopter to air lift him out of there as we speak". The man got helicoptered to the nearest ER, and the doctors did their best to save him. He ended up having to go on life support for three years until his family members finally decided to pull the plug. The medical insurance didn't cover life support and the family went broke because of it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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