SCUBA is spelt S C U B A

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How do you get a blond to fall over? Shoot her with a shotgun.

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

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Q: What is a man? A: A miserable little pile of secrets.

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How do you kill an elephant? -With a gun? No, an elephant gun. How do you kill a red elephant? -With an elephant gun? No, with a red elephant gun. How do you kill a blue elephant? -WIth a blue elephant gun? No, you choke it until it turns blue and kill it with a red elephant gun. How do you kill a purple elephant? Theres no such thing as a purple elephant, thus contradicting the reality of performing a major act of animal abuse on it.

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Why the mentally challenged man enter the bar? He's tired of being subject hate and criticism. He hates being the subject of jokes and being pointed at. He may not be able to tell you what 3x6 is, but he still has feelings. So because of all these inconsiderate people judging him, he now spends his days at the local bar, drowning his sorrows away in alcohol. I hope your happy.

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Why did the Asian woman drive 20mph on the highway? There was a deadly car accident with many fatalities.

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Q: What's worse than the holocaust. A: Me not getting my Christmas presents.

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Roses are Red Lemons are Sour Pull Down Your Pants And Give Me an Hour

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What is red, blue, and green all over? A piece of paper with three colors on it.

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What's the difference between a Justin Beiber concert and a hedgehog? With a hedgehog, the pricks are on the outside, but in a Justin Beiber concert, the pricks are on the inside.

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Q.What do you call a apple with a unibrow? A. A failed science experiment!!!

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Barack Obama

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I got a dig bick. You that read wrong, You read that wrong too.

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once upon a time, a bird fell in love with a fish.. they both died.

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i may not know where you sleep. but, i spiked your drink with sleeping pills

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I swear to drunk officer I'm not god.

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What did the man say to his brother? Nothing, because he just died in a tragic car crash.

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What did the midget get for Christmas? A new watch and a gift card for Applebee's.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms or legs. "Knock, Knock" "Who's There?" "Not Sally."

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What is the difference between a Ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

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Suzie hates cancer, Her granny got killed by a driver that suffered from it

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It had the utmost desire to.

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A fish and a human had a conversation. The conversation was not interesting because fish can't speak and the human felt awkward.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops