knock knock whose there? my penis.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? AIDS.

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Why does Danny work at the factory? Because Danny is in an substantial economic crisis, and doesn't have enough money to afford food for his 6 kids and wife. They will all most likely die soon, as his factory job will not provide enough money.

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Gay's rights

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call 803-389-9808 for a good time ;D

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Why do everytime I go to toilet for number 2. I look into the toilet to see if this one's nicer than the last one.

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Thomas the Tank Engine could see Express up ahead on the tracks! His driver shut off steam and applied his brakes. Ahead of him Gordon groaned "Ohhhhh stop your train! Stop your train! His driver and fireman jumped out quickly. Thomas tried his very hardest and eventually found himself slowing down. But there wasn't enough time and Thomas smashed right into the express. Seven people were killed and Thomas himself was smashed to pieces.

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What did the boy with no arms or legs get for christmas? Nothing, he also had no parents.

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A black man and a mexican are in a car. Whos driving? The cop. The two men were best friends who had taken off from their law firm. Alex had recently gone through a divorce and John decided to take him on a trip backpacking across Europe. Rain had come upon them and an off-duty police officer picked them up and took them to a nearby hotel. The three men had drinks and the friends had a wonderful time. But Alex never got over Jenny leaving him. 3 months later John found him dead in his home by auto-erotic asphyxiation.

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A Priest and a Rabbi pass a Muslim boy sleeping on the street. The Priest remarks "What a tragedy"; the Rabbi agrees and they both open non-denominational homeless shelters in their temples.

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Whats the difference between a blonde and a mosquito? A mosquito is a common insect in the family Culicidae. A blonde on the other hand is a Homo sapiens, a primate species of mammal with a highly developed brain, belonging to the family of great apes, along with chimpanzees, bonobos, gorillas, and orangutans

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding 2 worms in your apple.

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why is a squirrel called a squirrel? that's its name.

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Money is no object. Because I don't have any.

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a sailor went to his G.P to see if he had HIV turned out he had hepititis C

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An atheist and a Christian are sitting next to each other on the bus, however both of them believe it inappropriate to talk religion with complete strangers so neither one finds out about the others beliefs and they never see each other again.

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Two men walk into a bar... ..I didn't say what type of bar...

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What did the blind lawyer say to the doctor? We're both lawyers!

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Q: What did Stevie Wonder eat for dinner last night? A: Something consumable

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what did one picture frame say to the other? Well you could answer with hows it hanging but thats not logical because they are inanimate

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Why did the girl fall off her bike? Someone threw a piano at her.

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Why doesn't Michael Jackson like toast? Because he's dead.

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what is worse than finding a worm in your apple the earth exploding

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Sticks and stones may break my bones but words will cause me to develop a drinking problem.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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