Why didn't the blind girl say hi to anyone? Because she was blind.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What do you call a black man with cancer? A very unfourtunate man.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

A dog and a bird are sitting in the front yard of a small suburban community. The bird turns to the dog and says nothing, because birds lack the ability to speak. The dog then reaches down and slowly consumes the bird before returning to his house.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Your Moma so fat, she would roll down a hill.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What did the doctor say to the patient? You have cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

you'r mom is so fat that whenever she goes to the doctors, they are concerned about her cholesterol levels and high blood pressure.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

A black guy walks into a shoe store and buys a pair of size 14 shoes. The cashier smiles and says: so is it true what they say about big feet? The black guy laughs for a moment and responds: yeah it's really hard to find socks that fit.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

I helped build the town school. But when people see me, no one says "Hey, there's the guy that built the town school." I helped put out the flames, when the city was on fire. But when people see me they don't say "Hey, there's the hero that saved the city." But I have sex with one goat.... And people judge me justifiably asd having sex with goats is really disgusting and sticks in peoples minds.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

If a tree falls, and nobody is around to hear it, does it still make a sound? No. While the falling tree surely creates mechanical oscillations in the air, sound is defined as the mechanical oscillations in the air perceived by humans. Therefore, since no humans were around to hear the tree fall, it did not create a sound.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Waseem is sad because all his jokes are not funny!

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why did the rabbit fall out of the tree? because it was dead Why did the bird fall out of the tree? because it was stapled to the rabbit

thumb_up thumb_down +2

religion.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why did the little boy drown? He was stapled to a whale.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What does Patrick say? IM PATRICK!!! IM PATRICK PATRICK PATRICK PATRICK PATRICK PATRICK!!!!! PATRICK!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Dani barton= lovely

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Woman's rights

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What do you call a kid with no arms and an eye patch? Names! *ba dum chzz*

thumb_up thumb_down +2

So this guy comes into a bar... Jizz eveywhere.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Rudolf the rednosed reindeer died today. He was reported flying over Madrid when he was hit by a jumbo jet and a flock of seagulls. People are now saying that the reindeer in Spain was hit mainly by the plane.

thumb_up thumb_down

Brothers and sisters,I have none. But my sister's daughter is also my daughter...

thumb_up thumb_down

Are u that bald or is your neck blowing bubbles.

thumb_up thumb_down

How do you get a black man out of a tree? Politely ask him to come down

thumb_up thumb_down

Whats the difference between a blonde and a mosquito? A mosquito is a common insect in the family Culicidae. A blonde on the other hand is a Homo sapiens, a primate species of mammal with a highly developed brain, belonging to the family of great apes, along with chimpanzees, bonobos, gorillas, and orangutans

thumb_up thumb_down

Money is no object. Because I don't have any.

thumb_up thumb_down

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops