A terminte walks into a pub and ask is the bar tender here?

thumb_up thumb_down -24

On September 11th 2001, A worker of North twin tower man woke up to find his dog had chewed on his brand new phone. He went down stairs and realized his kitchen window had been broken. Getting ready to leave for work and saw his radio had been stolen out of his car. After finally making it to work and settling down in his office he spilled coffee on his lap. Enraged, the man yelled, "How could today get any worse!?"

thumb_up thumb_down -24

read this sentence again.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

silver bullet?

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Why did man lay down? His dog ate his genitals.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

What happend to the girl who went to school dreased ugly She took the other students advice and whent home and killed her self

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Whats bigger than a toaster and smaller than an oven? ... ... ... ... ... ... ... .... .... . ... . . . ..... ...... ..... a microwave . ..... . ... ...

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What's round and bounces A basketball No!!!!!!! You dummy!!! Then what? Boobies!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What do a blonde and a good beer have in common? They both go down easy.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Knock knock? Who's there? Herpes. Bummer.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Why do people waste there time writing Anti-Jokes Becuase they enjoy there right to the 1st ammendment and who are we to question it

thumb_up thumb_down -26

what did the bartender say to the customer? a. is it the first option b. is it the second option c. is it the third option.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

I got drunk last night and woke up in a bed and that's when I saw it. A 400 pound woman was in front of me and I could see the sweat drip down her ass fat and she let out a putrid fart right in my face. It smelt like rotten eggs and cheesy cauliflower. I am horrified.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Why did the chicken cross the road? Who cares

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Q: Why couldn't the black man swim? A: Because ever since he was a child, he has never taken swimming lessons before.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Why did Johnny throw the clock out the window? His parents are never around to supervise him.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What do you say to a horse at the vet? Good god, look at that ear infection.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

A dog walks into a bar. He's a service animal, so this is allowed.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What is the difference between a urologist and a can of chili? One is hot and spicy, and the other analyzes urine.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

what's the difference between a dolphin and a ghost? dolphins aren't ghosts!!

thumb_up thumb_down -26

whats brown and has wings? a stick, i lied about the wings bit

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Why did the dog run away from home? Because the owner left the door open.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What's red and has four letters? A stop sign

thumb_up thumb_down -26

"How high are you?" "I don't know, sir." "Well, look at the god damn altimeter."

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops