Why did the man jump in front of the car? He was clinically depressed, his wife left him and took the kids, he just lost his job. He thought he saw a 20 dollar bill in the street So he stopped to pick it up, not realizing a car was speeding toward him.

Q: Why do only 10% of women go to heaven? Your question is fundamentally wrong. Religion is a collective hallucination.

Whats more fun than throwing a dead baby off a cliff? Catching it with a pitchfork.

what do you call a gay guy? kevin

Why did suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock - who's there? Bob -bob who.... Bobs knocking for suzie!

Roses are c0ck violets are vag this joke is for george i like it like that<3xxxx

Let's play twenty questions. Alright, but I have to warn u I have piss running down my leg

Little Miss Muffet sat on a tuffet, but she had anal hemorrhaging so it really hurt

What's the difference between Republicans and Democrats? There is a series of boxes which one can choose to check on a ballot, officially registering an individual with a certain party. Available parties include the Green Party, The American Communist Party, The Republican Party, and the Democratic Party among others. Republicans choose to check the Republican box, Democrats choose to check the Democrat box. Also Republicans are closet homosexuals and Democrats are terrorists.

How is a frog similar to a corn dog? They both have really long tongues, except for the corn dog

how do yopu punish helen keller? Ground her, just like you would with any other child.

Why did the Muslim man get on a plane? Because he was going on vacation

A man says to his doctor, "doctor, doctor, I think I have a split personality." The doctor responds, "That makes 4 of us."

What did Stevie Wander get for christmas? A book

Roses are red, Metal is gray, Justin Beiber, is very gay

What did Rihanna remember when she corrected Chris Browns tweets she can't remember last thing she saw was a fist

What's worse than an hours detention? Gettind raped by a horse anally.

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No. Neither has Stevie Wonder.

Fuzzy wuzzy was a bear, fuzzy wuzzy had no hair. Fuzzy had no hair because he had cancer and died 3 weeks later.

What happened to the guy who dropped his soap in the prison shower? His friend picked it up for him.

A white man/women works behing the counter at a 7/11

Q: Why did the girl have dirty knees? A: Cause she was dragged through the forest and raped.

wanna hear a cat joke? just kitten

What's worse than requesting a three-some to your in-laws? Forgetting to suggest that they me too fragile and disabled, resulting in one of their limbs breaking.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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