knock know. who there?.............. whose there?.........whose there!?!?! damn kids

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How do you sink a Polish battleship? You breach the hull.

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What did the chair say to the fan? Nothing. Chairs and fans are objects so they do not have the physical ability to talk.

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A horse walks into a bar, the bartender asks him "why the long face?" "All horses have long faces" he replied.

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whats similar between a eagle and a armidillo? they both can fly. apart from the armidillo.

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A white man a black man a french man and a mexican are on a sinking ship. The French man says "we have too many of these" and throws a bunch of begets over board. The Black man says "we have too many of these" and throws a bunch of red hot cheetos overboard The Mexican man says "we have too many of these" and throws a bunch of Tacos over board. And then the White man says "we have too many of these" and throws the Mexican man overboard

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What did the dying man say to his friends? Nothing. He had no friends.

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The blonde is in the park withb a rope a man passes and says what are u doing, she says im goin o hang and kill myself. the next day the man comes back and sees the blonde there alive he says i thought u were goin hang yourself she says i tried but i couldnt breathe.

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I woke up today

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Why was OJ Simpson's knife covered in blood? Because he just murdered his wife.

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What's the difference between a white guy playing basketball and a black guy playing hockey??? There is none..they hardly get playing time!!

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You should read the Terms of Service.

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Why couldn't the little boy open his bedroom door? He was dead.

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I don't want to hear another joke about female hygiene, PERIOD! -Lets go Mets

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How do you get out of a car with only a baseball bat and a hammer? Unlock the door.

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There was a white kid named Tyrone.

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Cheese

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my wifes star sign is cancer, kinda ironic how she died really..... she got eaten by a giant crab.

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I used to say "I used to be an adventurer like you but then I took an arrow to the knee" like you but then I took an arrow in the knee.

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what do you do when life gives you lemons? take them, free shit is cool!

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When life gives you Live Aid, celebrate the fact that you've just gone back in time 27 years and somehow cheated death temporarily.

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what does lady gaga and a vacuum have in common? nothing. lady gaga is a human and the other is a house hold item.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Q: Why did the plane crash? A: The pilot lacked flying skills and experience.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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