So a dolphin is dropped off at a park and dies because he was out of the water to long.

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A forty-year-old man forces a young child to strip down and take a shower. The child screams and cries, but the man persists angily. He then carries the child into his bed. The child pleads, "Help! Mom, make him stop!" The mother yells back, "Just listen to him. He's your father and it's past your bedtime." This is a common night-time routine for parents with their first child

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was a depressed alcoholic drug addict whose children had all been diagnosed with a rare form of terminal brain cancer, and he decided to end it then and there by jumping in front of an approaching bus.

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Chinese men having large penis.

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Say you are caught in a net with 10 other people in said net at a construction site. A pair of scissors are right next to you and everyone said to use the scissors. But instead of using the scissors, you use your teeth in risk of a broken tooth.

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Why is 6 afraid of 7 because 7 is a escaped mental patient that thinks 6 betrayed him

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How many gun shots does it take to kill you? 1..2... 3...4... Samantha reapeatedly kept shooting her enemy until she noticed that her enemy was Chuck Norris. So how many gunshots does it take to kill Chuck Norris? The world may never know.

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? A vet, so he/she can put it down.

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How do you make a boy cry? Kill his family

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Why did Susie fall off the swing? She has no arms. Knock, knock Who's there? Not Susie

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Q: What's blue and fuzzy? A: Blue fuzz

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A blonde went to buy a Pizza and after ordering, the assistant asked the blonde if she would like her pizza cut into six pieces or twelve. "Six please" she said, "I could never eat twelve!"

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What is the biggest lie that's still close to the truth? You came out of your momma's asshole.

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Roses are red, Bacon is also red. Poems are hard, Bacon.

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How do you become a dragon ball super saiyan? You sit there and scream like you are giving birth for three minuets

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hey girl, My Gyarados is BIG enough for you to ride it ALL day and night

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Whats better than 1 person in your oven? 9 people in your oven.

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If a tree falls in the forrest and a women hears it does it make a sound? Why is there a tree in the kitchen.

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Bob has 80 chocolate bars, he gives 5 to his uncle,10 to his mother and 8 to his freind. He then eats 40 chocolate bars. Q. How many chocolate bars has bob got left now? A. Bob has no chocolate bars left. Shortly after Bob ate 40 bars he was diagnosed with diabetes. He then died of a heart attack due to high cholesterol.

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What did Timmy want for Christmas? Parents.

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Q: Whats Long, Black and Smells? A: Sh*t

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I was driving to Wal-Mart the other day and I saw a black man in a white Murcielago. I thought to myself that he must be doing good. Because everything he owns is white..... dick

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What's black, white, and red all over? A painting with black, white and red paint.

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A man sets his house on fire. His wife comes home, what did she ask? Why'd you set the house on fire?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops