It's a bird! No, it's a plane! No, it's actually a bird. You can see its wings flapping.

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What do you call a black man with a gun a soldier who is fighting for his country

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs? That depends on what his name is.

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What did God say to the priest while he was masturbating.... ... God doesn't exist.

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What's green, [ THIS BIG ] and flies around the room... A remote controlled gherkin!

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Why did the semen cross the road? Because i put on the wrong socks this morning

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What s the difference between a pigeon ?

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A man goes into the doctors office for his yearly checkup. The man waits patiently for several minutes until the doctor is ready to see him. After about ten minutes pass, the doctor is ready to see him. The man enters the doctors office. He passes all of the necessary tests. The doctor and him talk for a while. After a few minutes, the doctor says, "Okay, thanks for coming. See you next year." The man thanks the doctor and leaves.

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A guy walked into a bar. He got drunk. He hit a small child with his Suburu and was charged with a DUI.

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What did the wife get her husband after they had intercourse? A sandwich, because she loved him and knew he was hungry.

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Why did the beautiful woman marry the ugly poor old man? She was blonde & was therefor not aware that he wasn't rich nor younge.

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Tim is a bald headed prick with an annoying voice and he looks like a clean shaven Walter White if he was on the same drugs that he was making and he looks like he smokes too much because the wrinkles on his forehead look like lips.

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I was walking down a railway line the other day... I was fined £1000

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Why the monkey fall out the tree? Cause he was dead!

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XD Jackass.

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Roses are brown Violets are brown Everything's brown Who shit on my flowers

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What do you call a black man that flies a plane? A pilot you racist bastard!

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How do you make Lady Gaga cry? Make hurtful and upsetting remarks about her person.

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Why did the horse go to the other side of the field? He liked green grass

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Oh no my baby is dead. Ha.

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Why was the asian bad at sex? Because he was 5 years old

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A squirrel is about to steal the eggs of a sparrow when the sparrow suddenly says, "Stop! I will do anything if you would spare my eggs!" The squirrel has no capacity to reason and so steals the eggs anyway. The sparrow is devastated.

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B==========D-------------------------- im pissin man! god!

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what did the boy with no arms and no legs get for his birthday? a new bike.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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