Why couldn't the girl talk... she chocked to death -Alan Davis

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What did one teacher say to the other teacher? We're both under-payed.

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How many dead babies can you fit in a bathtub? 17

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What did lil' Suzy do when she got home from school? She was violently mutilated by a bear then continually but raped by a man she met on the Internet. Needless to say, she had a great time. -Harrison

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why is six afraid of seven? because six is a rapist

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John: what is blue and goes blub blub Phil; I don't know, what? John: a blue blub blub. What is green and goes blub blub Phil; a green blub blub John: no green blub blubs don't exist, what are you stupid?

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why did the clown stop laughing? because it got hit by an axe

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Your mom is so skinny that she may have anorexia, yet she could treat it so she doesn't die.

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Why was the bully in detention? He punched a fellow classmate.

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Bob has 80 chocolate bars, he gives 5 to his uncle,10 to his mother and 8 to his freind. He then eats 40 chocolate bars. Q. How many chocolate bars has bob got left now? A. Bob has no chocolate bars left. Shortly after Bob ate 40 bars he was diagnosed with diabetes. He then died of a heart attack due to high cholesterol.

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How do you make a small child cry? You cut off his fingers..

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What's black and white and red all over? Nothing, it is impossible for something to be red all over if there is black and white also.

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Lad: Whats that smell Girl: Nothing Lad: That is right nothing now get into the kitchen!

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That moment when the best part of your life is when you get 50 friends on Facebook....

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why was the man sad? his wife died

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What do you get when you cross an own and a bungee cord? My ass

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What is a pirate's favorite color? It depends on the pirate.

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An Irishman walked into a bar, except he would call it a pub, because there are slight differences in vocabulary in different regions, 37 minutes later he walked home safely, fed his cat, read some pages of a book he had been reading, turned the light off and went to bed.

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What happened when the chicken got to the other side of the road? It didn't, it got hit by a car.

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Wh do you call a Zeebra without black and white stripes? A horse

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Want to hear a joke? No.

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Your mama's so fat, she cries daily and regularly questions her purpose in life.

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Q: how many babies does it take to paint a house red? A: It Depends on how hard you throw them

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A man walked into a bar Ouch!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops