What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What do you get when you cross a RPG with a cell phone? A microwave

thumb_up thumb_down -2

A chinchilla and an octopus walk into a bar. What do they say? The octopus says Hello but the chinchilla says nothing because chinchillas cannot talk.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? Women's Rights

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What makes Stephen Hawking such a lame scientist??? A: He has a debilitating disease, it's called ALS.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What is yellow outside, black inside, and makes you laugh when it falls? A school bus full of black people falling from a clif

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Knock knock Who's there? No one, you have no friends.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

why dont they make black forks

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Patient: Doctor, I was cleaning my glass eye and accidentally swallowed it. Doctor: OK. Lean over and spread your legs. Patient: (Leans over and spreads his legs). Doctor: My God! This is the first time, in all my years of practice, that I've ever seen an asshole looking back at me!

thumb_up thumb_down -2

How many feminists does it take to change a lightbulb? It's a trick question. Feminists can't change anything.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What do people call baby cats in Alabama? Kittens.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

roses are black violets are black I'm blind i need a dog.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What did the Asian man say to the African man Ching Chang Chong

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What's worse than being arrested? Being arrested twice

thumb_up thumb_down -2

my uncle used to tickle me.. he's in prison for child abuse

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why did the slut suck a dick? Because she's a slut.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

A man with a magic watch says to a prostitute, "My magic watch says you are wearing any underwear." "YOU HAVE MAGIC WATCH?! Can it tell time too??!!!"

thumb_up thumb_down -2

a piece of string walks into a bar and the bartender says “sorry we dont serve your kind here” so the string goes outside twists himself round and ruffles up one of his ends then walks back into the bar, the bartender says “aren’t you the piece of string i just kicked out?” the string then replies “i’m a frayed knot”

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What do you call a mouse having sex? A spouse.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

J.D. has 10 vaginas and 2 penis's

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why did the little boy fall down the tree? He didn't. He jumped.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

How do you confuse a bus driver? Go invisible and throw bananas at him

thumb_up thumb_down -2

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops