do you have a pen i can borrow? yeah, here.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because, 32!

How do black guys say hi to each other? Hi.

how could you not hav not died of dehyderation?

What did the cow say to the farmer? moo

What do you call cheese that's not yours? Not yours.

Why is six scared of seven? Because seven is in his house with an axe.

Why did the blonde walk into the men's restroom? Because the blonde was a man who needed to expel his feculent waste.

roses are red, violets are blue, my son is gay, f**k my life...

I dont have a girlfriend

A man walks to his coathanger and shouts: "I AM GOING TO THE STORE!" his wife says not to because the Rapist 'Eggman' was out again. He says he will be careful. On his way to the store, he hears "They are the Eggmen, I am the Eggen-" but the man shouts "AND I'M THE WALRUS, SO SHUT UP AND GET OUTTA MY FACE OR I'LL KOO-KOO KOO-JOOB YOU AND YOUR CHILDREN!" the Eggman and the singer became friends and found two more from Liverpool who were excellent musicians. They formed the band 'The Beatles'. The Eggman shot the Walrus in 1980 after the band's breakup.

Knock knock. Who's there? Not Madeleine mecanne.

Why did the black man give his seat to a white man? Because the white man had a leg injury, and the black man was being a courteous good samaritan.

What is green and fuzzy and can kill you when it falls out of a tree A pooltable

What's the difference between Futurama and One Direction? Futurama only has one bender.

Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because she was hit by a refrigerator.

why did kyle and jake have sex? Because they were gay.

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's wife? No. Oh don't worry then.

A black man goes to his dentist appointment and the doctor asks, have you brushed your teeth today laderius? the black man replies: Yes, but my name is not laderius

How do you know if a girl is special? If she hates justin bieber, Twilight, and is open to threeways.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead

What do cookies and Ruber have in common? Ones edible one is not

Wanna know what is gross? a dead baby in a dumpster. Grosser? Ten dead babies in a dumpster. Grosser? There is a live one at the bottom. Grosser? It ate its way out. Grosser? It came back for seconds.

What did the guy say when he dropped his baby? "oh no!"

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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