Two olives are sitting on a counter, one falls off and the other one asks "Are you okay?" and he replies, "It is only a slight wound I think I will be just fine"

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why did Samantha fall off the building? She was hit by a flying fridge dropped by a traffic helicopter.

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Why did Hitler commit suicide? ... ... He committed suicide for the simple reason that the soviet and allied forces were closing in on him and he knew that he did not stand a chance of winning the war.

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i love weed i fuc king really do i fuc king love smoking weed with you.And i love a fat spliff and i love a fat bong why cant we all just sing along!!!

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What do you not want to call a african american that begins with an N and ends with an R? A Neighbor!

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What did the boyfriend give his girlfriend for her birthday? A S.T.D

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"Lady's and Gentlemen, hobos and trams Cross side mosquitoes and bald legged ants Pull up a chair and sit on the floor and I'll tell you I've never heard before Of one bright day in the middle of night Two dead boys got up to fight Back to Back they faced each other Drew their swords and shot each other A deaf policeman heard the noise Came and killed the two dead boys If you don't believe this lie is true Ask the blind man he saw it too"

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Knock Knock Whos there? The Police, your mother just died of bowel cancer.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? His wife and children had just been struck by a moving vehicle traveling at approximately 45 miles per hour trying to cross the same road. He ran across the road to comfort his dying wife and two children as they took their final breaths. The chicken was also not really a chicken but a middle-aged man who had recently been laid off his job and diagnosed wiuth an incureable disease.

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Where did Sheyanne go during the bombing...... Everywhere

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What happened when a Black man ran into a white supremacist? They exchanged insurance information

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knock knock whos there? jim okay come in.

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Why couldnt Julia find her cat? she has gone crazy from old age, her cat actually died 10 years ago

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Your mum is so dead, when I kick her she doesn't move.

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Mother Mary held her daughter 20 minutes under water. Not to save her from her troubles, just to see the funny bubbles

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"Honey im home!" but his honey was dead on the floor along with his 3 kids.

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Why did no one throw a fridge at the boy on the swing? Because fridges are heavy.

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"What's uhhh.". "Crap I forget" "Oh yeah! 32!"

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Knock Knock. *Silence* Knock Knock. *Silence* Knock Knock. *Silence* *Busts open door* "Oh right... I killed Bob last week.

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Why didnt little timmy have a pencil? He was poor

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Your momma;s so fat she stepped on the scale and said one at a time please!

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Why Did the boy fall off his bike? Because someone threw a fridge at him

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So there were two... sigh... I hate my life....

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Say this fast: Alpha kenny body sofa king hard with mike hawk. :)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops