What happens if a girl punches a guy? A white man in prison, convicted of sexual assault.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

How did superman always save the day? Because he was a fictional tv actor so he could do whatever he wanted to.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? That would depend on the individual situation at hand and to assume you could accurately estimate that is ridiculous.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

balls

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Z.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Two drums and a sybol fall off the edge of a cliff. They hit a random pedestrian at the bottom killing him instantly. da-dum ch

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What starts with P and ends with ORN? POPCORN

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Whats 10 times worse than a war? Ten wars.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Bariande: I have a belly button Kraken: haha who doesnt? MissAwkward: i dont Barinade: neither do i. haha this happened on tiny chat.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Q: What's worse than finding a hundred dead babies, in one bin? A: Finding one dead baby, in a hundred bins.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What do you call an old widow with 12 cats? Forever alone.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What do you get when you cross Justin Bieber with a chicken? Most likely some kind of singing human-chicken monster, although given the little research done on cross-species splicing, this is a highly improbable circumstance.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

what did Susie, the girl with no arms, say after she fell off the swing? nothing, she was killed on impact.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Did it hurt when you fell from heaven, or have you been in a wheelchair all your life?

thumb_up thumb_down +17

How many ADD kids does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Let's ride bikes!

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Q: What do you call a kid with no arms and an eye patch? A: Names

thumb_up thumb_down +17

A middle-aged white woman is walking toward a building, talking on her cellphone to a friend. She says, "Yes, I can meet you for lunch in a few hours. I have to go to the unemployment office to sign up for benefits. It's going to be horrible. It'll probably be full of black people." Standing in line, she is incredibly uncomfortable and horrified, because there is a black man right behind her, and she is stuck standing next to him for a long time. Finally it's her turn, and she steps up to the counter. The clerk asks her, "And what did you do for a living?" She answers, "I mopped the floors and cleaned the bathroom in a Blockbuster store that closed down." The clerk says, "Fill out this paperwork and take it to window #2." As she turns around, she is once more repulsed by the black man who is standing right there. Now that it's his turn, he steps to the counter, and the clerk asks him, "And what did you do for a living?" He answers, "I was the senior vice president of global strategic development for Eastman Kodak."

thumb_up thumb_down +15

A chicken crosses the road and goes into a bar and recites the following poem: Roses are red Violets are blue Knock Knock Who's there? Sugar is sweet Sugar is sweet who? And so are you. The bartender was confused considering she's a blonde. A genie appears and says to the Mexican he'll grant him 3 wishes. The black guy, the white guy, and the jew were at the bar also. The priest was also drinking. They all had a great time.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why didn't the 9-year-old girl go to school on monday? Because she lived in a country where women don't have rights and was traded as a commodity for 2 pigs to be a wife for a 43 year old man.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Q. What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the car? A. Robin, get in the car.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Q. Whats green jumps up and down and then red? A.A frog in a mixer

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Roses are dead Violets are too Were all gonna die So are you.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

A wooly mammoth and a dodo bird walk into a bar. Just kidding.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Suicide Johnny and the Go Kill Yourselves

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops