Knock Knock Who's there? The KGB Yes, How can I help? We are looking for a local serbian mobster who we believe to be hiding in this Village have you seen this man. No I cant say I have. Sorry Well thank you for your time and if you notice anything please try and let the local Police know.

whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? not finding a worm in your apple, i quite like them actualy

Q. Why doesn't Michael Jackson like toast? A. Because he's dead.

What's the difference between Izzy and a hobo? Nothing...they both have no job and no friends

Abbie shaved her arse today....then it smiled at me

Why are all black people fast? because all the slow ones are in jail.

Three men are all in a car park and they all want the same parking spot. As it turns out, it was a trolley bay

"Lady's and Gentlemen, hobos and trams Cross side mosquitoes and bald legged ants Pull up a chair and sit on the floor and I'll tell you I've never heard before Of one bright day in the middle of night Two dead boys got up to fight Back to Back they faced each other Drew their swords and shot each other A deaf policeman heard the noise Came and killed the two dead boys If you don't believe this lie is true Ask the blind man he saw it too"

What would happen if RAINN Wilson, the actor, married Michael MANN, the director? They'd probably be arrested; 2 men can't get married in California anymore (thanks a lot, Utah)!

Roses are grey Violets are gray Tulips are grey Lilly's are grey Dandelions are grey Daisy's are grey Daffodils are grey I am colour blind.

Roses Are Red, Violets Are Blue, I Love Chocolate, More Than I Love You

What do you call love at first sight? A broken heart.

hey do you eat out a woman properly? you cook her first and then eat her. -jeffery dahmers

why do people copy other people's anti-jokes? because they don't have a life nor an imagination. P.S. if this gets a lot of thumbs ups, expect another one soon from one of those people who copy others anti-jokes...

What do you call a cow after an earthquake? Dead. The barn collapsed on top of it.

What is it too late to do? Apologize...

Why didn't the woman make sandwiches? She was making baguettes.

What do you get when you cross George Bush and Barack Obama? Presidents.

Roses Are Red, Violets Are Blue, I Can't Sing, Or Ryhme

how do you find a ghost? shoot yourself.

What did the African want for breakfast? Ebola cereal

Yo momma is so ugly, that she has no mirrors in her home to avoid the feeling of disgust and sadness she gets whenever she sees her reflexion

I just lied when I clicked the 'I have read and agree to the Terms of Service' to post this when in fact, I didn't read it at all.

What do you call a gay scientologist? His first name or last name, depending on how close you 2 are.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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