How do you wake up your grandmother........ You don't, she had a massive heart attack and died in her sleep

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Why did the litle boy's hat come off? cause he got hit by a train!

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kieran scott peels his off his foreskin while he watches hentai porn then he eats it afterwards, he is also on roids

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adele is so fat that when shes on a plane she makes the skyfall

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Q: What did the blind deaf orphan get for Christmas? A: Cancer

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You're Mother's so fat, she sat on a chair, and it broke.

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Why did the blonde switch the lamp on? Because it was getting dark

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A horse walks into a bar, the bartender says why the long face? The horse does not reply because it is a horse. He then is confused of where he is and gallops out of the bar, knocking over a couple stools.

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Q: What did Tommy do when it was time to go to bed? A: Go to bed. Q:What did Tommy do when it was time to wake up? A: Kill him self.

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Q: Whats The Difference between Batman and Blackman? A: One can go to a store without Robbing it...

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Two muffins are sitting next to each other in the dessert. A hungry and lost man passes by and considered eating one of the muffins. Unfortunately he can't make a decision in time and took of in his 4-wheel drive. The next day a camel walks by and eats one of the muffins. The camel dies instantly, apparently the muffin the camel ate was poisoned. The now not so hungry and lost man looks at the dead camel and noticed the zoo is almost closing now. So he left in a hurry, to cook for his family.

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An old jewish man, an irish man, and a young mexican woman in her mid 20's are on an island. They eventually become hungry to a extremely ravishing extent. The jew cries out: "I can't take the thought of consuming man, because I am only allowed to consume kosher" The Mexican says: "Alright" The Irishman says: "O.K. Until then lets head over to Timilio's... I hear they are a fine establishment and also serve Kosher meals."

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what's worse than fining out that the best and worst jokes on anti-joke.com are about the Holocaust The Holocaust

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. The chicken was ran over before it made it to the other side.

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I was so fat I went on a diet

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Dave and Tim walk into a bar. The bartender says to Dave: "What'll it be?" Dave is black.

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A white man, hispanic man, and a black man walk into a bar together. They order cokes.

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Why are Jewish men curcumsized? Because Jewish women wont put their hands on anything that's not 20% off

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Why did little Sally drop her ice cream? She got ran over by the school bus

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One day, an Irishman, a Jew and an American were walking home from a long game of golf. "God, that was a long game" said the American, to which the Irishman replied "aye, that it was." The Irishman then turned to the Jew, and asked him how he managed to get two birdies in succession. The Jew, after a moment of deliberation, began to explain. "Well, it all began when I was six. See, there was a mountain right next to Casparia, the village I lived for most of my life back in Wales. Every day, I'd come back from school, and ask my dad why nobody ever attempted to scale the mountain. 'To do so would be an unnecessary risk, son, and people are too busy working to put food and water on the tables for their families to undertake something so foolish.' One night, when insomnia was getting the better of me, I decided to get a better look at the mountain, so I strapped on my boots, my fur coat and some woolly mittens and left for the mountain. After a few hours of walking, I approached the closest hill which gave me a perfect view of the mountain's first peak, and there I spotted a polar bear, mauling a hiker to death." The Jew paused to check the Irishman and the American were following, when the American spoke up; "hold on there, there aren't any polar bears in Casparia!" The Irishman also spoke up; "there isn't even a village called Casparia, well, anywhere!" The Jew smiled slightly, and a few seconds later the smile broke out into a gigantic grin, and he finally replied: "exactly".

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How do you make a health inspector give you a good report? Throw his family into a pack of alligators.

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A programmer, and engineer and an accountant meet up for an after work drink. Afterwards they go home to their separate apartments and think how socially inadequate they are.

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What's brown and sticky? A stick!

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Alright then, call me sometime then.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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