Wanna hear a funny joke? I can't think of one at the moment...

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It wa Jerry's first day of kindergarten He pulled out a .44 magnum and shot himself under the chin where he was instantly dead... Yes, dead

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why did the girl eat a banana? because she was hungry

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A: B: No pun intended.

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The 17 year old buy called his computers support number to remove a virus from his old computer, so he can gift the computer to his little cousin for his birthday. But before giving the computer to his cousin he downloaded over 120 hours of adult film onto it.

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What's worse than 10 babies in one trash can? One baby in 10 trash cans.

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What has four wheels and smells like an asshole? YOU.

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Give a man a fish, feed him for a week. Teach a man to fish, he'll starve to death. Provide this man a fishing rod, and now finally you're doing something helpful.

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Why didn't Jeffrey become a butler? He did become a butler.

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THIS IS an anti-joke.

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knock knock who's there? Bill Bill who? Bill Smith, we went to high school together. Oh hey Bill, come on in.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting raped by a giant scorpion. What's worse than getting raped by a giant scorpion? Getting raped by two giant scorpions

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What do you call a duck In Africa ? Screwed

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What's black and white and red all over? Two nuns in a chainsaw fight.

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A woman walks into a cave, and the entrance collapses. She spends two days in the cave. She comes close to death, due to lack of nutrition, but is thankfully rescued by a dog walker. She spends several days in hospital recovering. The experience really opens her eyes to life, and she learns not to take her loved ones for granted, and to really make the most of her life. Finally she is allowed to go home. The next day, she is hit by a bus.

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Why did Max drink the red Gatorade? Because he likes it more than all of the other flavors.

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What do you call a black man who flies a plane? A Pilot

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Roses are red Violets are blue NO SHIT EINSTEIN!

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How do you stop moles from digging in your garden? Take the shuvel away.

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The nurse at a hospital came out of the delivery room and chucked the baby down the hall to the father. The dad starts crying and the nurse starts laughing and said, "It's ok, it was already dead."

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What is Jetlag? When your computer is running too many applications in the background while you're trying to play a game of Jetman so it starts lagging.

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-Wanna hear a joke? -Not really -Oh

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Did you hear about the dyslexic eye chart maker? His disability caused to him to have a difficult time at work and his production suffered because of this.

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why did the monkey fall out of the tree? because it was DEAD!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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