What swims in the ocean? Fish

How do you wake up lady gaga? Set an alarm for an appropriate time

Q:What did the ginger get for Christmas? A: A soul...jk,hair dye

A man walked into a bar because he worked there.

What's another word for a priest? Rapist

A man walks into a bar. While he sits on a barstool, a man greets him politely, and they proceed with light conversation.

Why did the bus driver get arrested? Because he hijacked the bus.

Kid- "Where do babies come from?" Mom- *Commits Suicide*

How do you have se with hellen keller? Very sweetly

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding half a worm in your apple.

Guess what I did to the clown I hit it with an axe

A dog goes to his food bowl. He eats his dinner.

What's brown and green and if it falls out of a tree on top of you, it will kill you? A pool table

Justin Bieber walked into a gay-bar, The whole world applauded.

What did grandma receive for her 75th birthday? Alzheimer's.

A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf."

I'm a little teapot, short and stout. Here is my handle, here is my spout. When I get all steamed up here me shout: Absolutely nothing because I'm a teapot you maniacal psychopath.

What is the difference between a black guy and a road? One you put tar on and the other one is a road

Why was the black man a victim of racial prejudice? because he was black

An Asian walks out of the library.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree He had no limbs

why do blonds write TGIF toes go in first

Jews

Did you hear about the couple that met in a revolving door? They died.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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