Q. Why Did The Blond Have The Biggest Tits In The Third Grade? A. Because She Was 21

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house! Nock. Nock. Whos there? The Chicken?

I swear to god it wasn't me! Dont swear to god its a sin !

Whats hotter than the sun? Larger stars.

why did the moose cross the road? to eat the baby.

Micheal Jackson walks into a bar?

Roses are red Violets are twisted bend over now your about to get fisted

Q:theres a man on a tight rope 3000 feet above ground and theres a man getting head from a 90 year old women with no teath. what did they both say? A: dont look down.

Know what's worse than three bee stings? living every day in fear of your schizophrenic hallucinations

I've had amnesia as long as I can remember

Two dinosaurs go to a theme park. On the way home they contemplate that they didn't really enjoy themselves. They decide to buy some ice cream to cheer them up a bit. They are severely frustrated by the lack of fun they had for the money they paid. Then they go to sleep. I completely forgot how this joke went, but your mom's a slut.

Q: What did Stevie Wonder eat for dinner last night? A: Something consumable

In the movie Inception, what does the man do after he thinks about calling out to his children so he could see them one last time? The man calls out to his children.

knock. knock. whos there? BOWLING SHOE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Why did Sally fall of the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock! Who's there? Sally with prosthetic arms.

When life gives you lemons, find someone with a papercut.

How many dead babies fit into a bathtub? 23

who is mark

whats worse than forgetting to buy cinnamon toast crunch at the grocery store? Getting beat to death with a gallon of rotten milk...

Bob was in trouble. He forgot his wedding anniversary. His wife was really pissed. She told him "Tomorrow morning, I expect to find a gift in the driveway that goes from 0 to 200 in 6 seconds AND IT BETTER BE THERE !!" The next morning he got up early and left for work. When his wife woke up, she looked out the window and sure enough there was a box gift-wrapped in the middle of the driveway. Confused, the wife put on her robe and ran out to the driveway, brought the box back in the house. She opened it and found a brand new bathroom scale. Bob has been missing since Friday.

Why did the Kitty stop meowing? Because its dead.

What's something 9/10 people enjoy? A gang rape.

Me, myself, and I walked into a bar. We didn't say anything to each other because I'm not schetsophrenic.

The Pope

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...