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Why was timmy in the well? He had autism.

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How did Harry potter open the door? He had the key

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gay porn...

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There are two types of people in the world: 1. people who can extrapolate from incomplete data And I have two wonderful pieces of advice: 1. Never tell anyone everything you know

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A paraplegic walks into a bar.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I suck at poems Nice tits

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What's funny about a man walking into a bar? He was a clown.

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What do you call a fat black guy in KFC? A guy who likes KFC.

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Have you ever seen the episode of the powerpuff girls where they save the day?

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What do you call a sandwich that has sandwich on it? A sandwich.

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im gonna sue mcdonalds i asked for a hamburger and it was a beef burger -_-

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http://www.dafk.net/what/

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How many pancakes does it take to build a doghouse? Pancakes are not a feasible material with which to build a doghouse.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. The chicken was run over by a truck before he could get to the other side

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Why was the boy kissing up to his parents? He only wanted them to say "I love you" for once.

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Why do men find it difficult to look each other in the eyes? The answer actually has deep routes in their psyche, subconsious, and psychological development as children.

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A talent agency is giving auditions and is just about to rap it up when a family shows up. They reluctantly agree to their "brief" audition given that they had found no suitable talent that day. The routine starts with the father starting 6 chainsaws at once while simultaneously starting a juggling/lumberjacking routine. His beautiful wife proceeds to toss him additional chainsaws (as he continually throws them for dramatic effect) while also maintaining a hypnotizing dance which seems to drain your desire to leave from your very soul. The children take turns jumping in between the chainsaws while doing a silent replay of the movie, "Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon." After it plays out the father tosses the final chainsaw up in the air which lands standing straight, quivering in the dust of the studio. The studio manager says, "Why that's an AMAZING act!! I'll sign you right now! What do you call your act?" In response to which, the father shits on his desk.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. It got mercifully trampled by a nearby 18 wheeler.

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A man walks into a pet shop. He says to the shopkeeper, "Excuse me, do you have any dogs going cheap?" The shopkeeper replies "We feel that we price our animals reasonably, but the cheapest type of dog we have is £50." The man realises that, unfortunately, he cannot afford a dog. Instead he purchases a goldfish. It wasn't the same.

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How many black people does it take to screw in a lightbulb? There are many circumstances that could affect the outcome of the situation. One of them is whether or not the given people have or will soon obtain a ladder. In this case, the lightbulb could take more time than needed to be screwed in and effectively changed. Another key factor in the situation is the number of people. If there are enough people to reach the ceiling without a ladder, the lightbulb could be screwed in sooner or later than asked by the owner of the facility in which the lightbulb socket is installed. Finally, the height of the persons given is a crucial point in this situation. The people may be tall, thus allowing there to be fewer people needed. The people could be short and need a greater number of people than if the people were, perhaps, a bit taller. All in all, I'd say about 1-2.

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Why did Osama bin laden plan 9/11? Same reason Justin bieber was born....

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Why could the woman not play the game monopoly? Because she did not own the game monopoly

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My Joke Is The Persons Below Me I I V

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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