a horse is running across a cliff at 54 miles per hour, against the wind. he has been running for three hours. he needs to run for 347 more kilometers before he is tired. the wind is blowing at a speed of 10 miles per hour... he wonders if he will make it when suddenly he falls off the cliff. why did he fall of the cliff? it was a retarded horse.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? At age two, she contracted an illness that left her blind, deaf, unable to speak, and was considered backwards of intelligence. She lived in a dark and hopeless world of her own, rendering her unable to do anything, let alone drive.

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Whats worse than getting a papercut on the side of your finger? Being shot in the face by a shotgun that shoots fireworks that explodes into chainsaw bullets.

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What is purple and flies? A purple plane.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Oh wait i screwed up, Because of u

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Q: whats worse than a Muslim? A: a Jew

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What do you do if you see a bleeding Mexican in your front yard? Quickly respond to the accident and supply the wounded victim with first aid.

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Why did Suzie fall off her swing? She was dead

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?ti saw won troffe eht htrow t'nsaw yllaer siht

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What do you call a black man that sells drugs? A pharmacist.

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How to confuse a blonde. Buy 14 monkeys dye them purple and orange and hide them in her wardrobe

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Why was the little girl crying? She got slapped with a porcupine.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, your so ugly, im going to kill you! Just kidding.......... Violets are purple. -Harrison

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What's better than a worm in your apple? No worms in your apple.

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No I do not think that, that would be a wasted thought.

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Who makes the sandwiches in a lesbian relationship?

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Waiter, waiter! There is a fly in my soup. Sorry about that sir, we will replace your order and make your meal complementary.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's house? Yes, but he hasn't.

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What does a human have in common with a tree?? You can cut a humans leg of and count the....oh wait

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Why did the man throw his watch out the window? Because it was broken.

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Hey I just meet you And this is crazy I took bath salts Your face looks tasty

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Q: What's worse than 10 dead babies in a tree? A: I'm sure there are lots of things.

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A fish swims up stream for his natural spawning cycle. The fish was out of shape and died from heart failure.

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what is long, black and looks like a curly-hair? A curly-hair

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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