Why'd the duck cross the road? To get to your house. Knock knock! Who's there? The duck.

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Chuck Norris can beat an eleven-year-old in a fight.

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Can you get me a stapler,make sure it has staples because if it doesn't..........I won't be a ble to staple anything

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A man is eating a sandwich. He is promptly shot in the face.

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What did the man say to his wife at the funeral. Nothing, he was dead

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If you're happy and you know it - put your hands in the air i have a gun.

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whats worse than a dead baby? A pile of dead babies and their grieving mothers standing over them. thats what.

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What time is it when an elephant sits on your watch? I don't know, I don't have a watch anymore.

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Q: What do you call a hobo asking for change? A: Get off my driveway!

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two parrots are seated on a perch. One turns to the other and says, "Do you smell fish?"

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Yo momma so hot she won a beauty contest and was later shot and killed by the jealous losers

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whats the only concert you can get into for 45 cents? a 50 cent concert featuring Nickelback

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two guys walk into a bar. the third guy ducks

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Why was the Black Panther upset? Because racial tensions were high in the 60s.

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What's the best thing about twenty six year olds? There are 20 of them.

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How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? None.

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Why didn't the boy go to school? He was sick.

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What does ms colot like to eat? Pants

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A Woman decides she wants to stop making sanwiches for her sexist boyfriend. She walks away and lives a happy life. In hell.

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Why did Doris want to father children? Because she wanted to have a fry-up with the leftover baby oil

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Why is Jesus not real? Because Chuck Norris is still alive.

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Man :A homo-sexual panda walks into a gay bar.... Homo-sexual Panda : Wait...wait I'm gonna stop you right there. I will not take part in this odd joke, so just ummmmmm ya. And another thing, my species is extremely offended by your inferior remarks. Why can't homosexual panda just have piece? Man 1: Were the hell did you come from? Homo-sexual Panda: My mother's uterus same as you, retard.

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A white man wakes up in the middle of the night and sees a black burglar trying to steal his hard earned possessions that he slaved many hours for, being a man who enjoyed living a man of luxury and hates people of foreign nature who steal his things said to him. " get out"

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To visit his dying grandma in the hospital

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops