why didn't the printer work? it was in the toilet.

1. A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: ''Ugh, that's the ugliest baby I've ever seen!'' The woman walks to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her: ''The driver just insulted me!'' The man says: ''You go up there and tell him off. Go on, I'll hold your monkey for you.''

What does WTF stand for? Welcome to Facebook!

Q: What do Obama and George Washington have in common? A: They are both intelligent, trustworthy presidents who truly care for what is best for the United States. Except for Obama.

A man walks into a bar, has a drink, pays the bartender, and leaves.

Q: Why did the Klansman go up to acclaimed rapper and television star, Flavor Flav, and say "Do you know what time it is, boy?" A: Because his trademark "bling" seems to be an actual functioning time piece. Q2: Why did that same Klansmen brutally murder Flavor Flav after he learned it was 5:46 in the pm? A2: Becasue Flavor Flav is black and that's kinda what you're expected to do in the Klan...

Why did the Koala Bear fall out of the tree? Because shortly before, it's life had ended due to lethal chlamydia, which is not uncommon for a Koala Bear these days. Due to it's loss of thought and therefore muscle control, it lost it's grip on the branch it was holding and naturally gravity took over.

What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Having sexaual relations with your own mother.

What's pink, wrinkly and hangs out your trousers? Your nan.

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs floating in a lake? Bob.

What did one potato say to the other. Let's get baked!( hope u dont mind that this isnt a anti-joke well i dont know what it is so sue me)

Whats funny about the Holocaust? Absolutely nothing considering millions of people perished and you people think its funny!

Q. What does a rock and a bird have in common? A. Everything. Except a bird can fly and has wings and can breath and eats and makes babies...

Q - what did one plate say to the other? A - FOods on me tonight!

Why was the fish swimming on the water? Oh wait it's dead

What do you call a black man who walks into a jail cell? A hard working and dedicated police officer who was just putting his first offender in jail.

Q: What do you get when Justin Bieber gets his own tv show? A: suiside!

Knock knock Come in No you supposed to say who's there Oh, who's there? Jennifer Come in No, you supposed to say Jennifer who Oh, Jennifer who? Forget it

A man walks into a bar. We see him as he approaches the register wearing a dark hoody. The surveillance camera seen here catches a glimpse of the man's face appearing to be a white male with mustache and beard. As you can see the man opens the register and takes the money before the bartender can get to him. If you have any information about this crime please call crime stoppers at 1-800-GET-HELP. In other news, the DOW JONES reached a record high today as investors in China begin working on keeping the economy from plundering.

Why did the fat guy get a gun? Because he was tired of all the fat jokes...

Q: Why did you fall of that swing? A: Because I'm fat.

Whats the difference between football and basketball? Absolutely everything By darragh Hamilton

Q: What do you call a man with no arms and no legs being pulled behind a boat? A: Skip.

new year new me my nigga's chilling on the couch . he'l be happy if i put my dlck inside his mouth next one: i got 4 but i give it to mr. gore when he say whats your name? me:hey my mane is Erick bryan and my puss* is wet wait nonono :D

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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