what did the thief say to the man that lost his car? i stole your car.

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A bar walks into a man... The man begins screaming uncontrollably as the corner of the building is inserted into his anus. Brick by brick, the bar forces its way inside the man's ass, as blood begins dripping down his legs. The man knows damn well it is impossible for such a large building to be contained inside him, but he grits his teeth and forces his ass open wider. His ribs break, his lungs collapse, and his now lifeless body is stretched into the shape of the bar. The bar is almost entirely consumed before the man's skin gives way to the bulging pressure...with an explosion of blood & organs, the shredded remains of the man are slung-shot around the lot where the bar formerly stood. The bar, now soaked in a mixture of blood & organ fluid, reflects upon the failure of its experiment. For the next attempt, a man of far greater fortitude must be used, so that his body does not burst so easily. Only then will it achieve its dream of becoming the first bar to walk into a man.

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Josh, this is your mother. I was wondering if you wanted me to bring my lube and strapon to bed tonight. Wait never mind about the strapon because i have my dick to use.

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Why did the chicken cross the road. grass was greener on the other side!

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Why is my brother so bad at making anti jokes cuz HE HAS a sense of humor

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What begins with "F" and ends in "uck"? There are multiple words or word combinations that begin with "F" and end in "uck," such as fat duck, so you dont need me to tell you, be creative.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was convicted of murder and rape

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Knock Knock... Who's there? Nine... Nine who? Nine Eleven.

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What did the businessman do to get a promotion? He traded oral sex for his male bosses kind heart...

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Q: Why do Asian children tend to be smarter than other children A: They have longer school years

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knock knock whos there the game __i lost the game__

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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A cat walks into a bar. He orders some beer. The bartender asks, why the sad face. The cat replies, "I got laid off"

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What did the big Chimney say to the little Chimney? Nothing they are chimneys ....

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a worm in your penis.

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How many black basketball players does it take to change a lightbulb? One. They're all rather tall therefore they can reach the light source with ease.

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A man walks into a bar, orders a drink, drinks it, and leaves.

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What did one tree say to the other tree? Nothing, trees can't talk.

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Why didnt the boy finish the race? Becuase he stepped on a land mine.

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a man walks into a bar... he was shot to death because he was a slave during the 1910s

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what do you get when a white woman and black man have a child? either a girl or a boy

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Why did the naked blonde crossed the road? Because she a man

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What do you hear when the world trade center collapsed?, no seriously I wasn't even three yet.

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Why was the teacher having sex with her pupils? Because it was 2145 and that kind of shit is common then

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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