The power of Mindfuck: What if you can only walk left when you are right? And if you can walk right when you are the only one left? What is left when everything is right? Moral: Create a right world by taking the left road? YOU PIECE OF FILTH!

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What do you call a black person who flies a plane? A pilot!

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Good friends are like snowflakes. They disappear when you pee on them.

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The air is green The grass is blue I'm bot stoned.. I'm just high

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Q:Why are all of the vampires extinct? A:AIDS is a serious disease. You shouldn't joke about it.

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George Washington, a priest, a nazi and a jew are on a plane that's going to crash. There is only one parachute. George Washington says "For my country" and jumps off without a parachute. The priest says "For God" and jumps off without a parachute. The nazi says "For Hitler" and pushes the jew off and takes the parachute.

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Roses are blue Violets are too I've got Alzheimer Roses are red

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Roses are red Violets are red Grass is red OMFG MY LAWN IS ON FIRE !!!?

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Why did sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock, whos there? Not sally

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NA LINDOL BA KAPAG NATALON ANG MATATABA :8

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What happened to the man who grew into the couch? He was surgically removed and forced to exercise daily. He is feeling much better now.

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You smell just like a black person. With your nose.

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What's long hard and full of seman. A submarine.

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What's the difference between a black guy and a white guy? One has a slightly darker skin complexion

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What do you call a guy with no arms or legs laying on your driveway? You call him by his name

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Girl 1: I just can't find the man who'll make the perfect husband for me. Girl 2: Maybe you're asking for too much. Girl 1: Yeah, probably.

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roses are red violets are blue sugar is sweet and grass is green due to the fact that there is chlorophyll in it.

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How do you stop a blind kid from walking into oncoming traffic? .................to late!!!!!!!

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "Why the long face?" The horse does not respond because it is a horse. It can neither speak nor understand English.It is confused by it's surroundings and gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few tables.

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Q:whats the wost thing that can happen to you when you find something? A:not finding something

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Jimmy: Knock Knock Nick: Whose there? Jimmy: Joe Nick: Joe Who? Jimmy: Joe Mamma Nick: No shes dead.

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how did the fat man get up the stairs he walked

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Roses are red, But ravens are black, Please go to China, and never come back!

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A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look." The father begins by juggling some balls. The mother pulls out her harmonica and begins playing "Dixie". The children and dog try and get the dog to jump through a hoop. For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "The Aristocrats!"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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