Q. What's the difference between Michael Jackson and a plastic bag? A. One is white, plastic and dangerous to young children, the other is a plastic bag.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

WWII veteran screamed! "You damn yellow monkey" "But sir... ...my fur is brown!" Replied the monkey.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

whats fat, green and hairy? Nothing I would pleasure myself to.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

what do you get if you cross a scotsman , who knows nothing about football and a indian? Blackburn rovers, and a good night out

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What did the cow say to the chicken crossing the road? Moo

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What do skeet disks and Jewish babies have in common? Hitler used to shoot them out of the sky.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

A ham sandwich walks into a bar, bartender says "We don't serve food here."

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Roses are red Violets are blue Sunflowers are yellow You were probably expecting a poem or something but no this is just a gardening fact

thumb_up thumb_down -7

An English man, Irish man and a Scotsman walk into a bar. And have a wonderful evening of multicultural entertainment and fun together.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

How do you drown a blonde? A: Drowing any person no matter the color of their hair is conpletely illegal and considered murder.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

A duct walks into a bar. The writer meant to write duck and then proceed to make a clever joke but instead a typo was made and a very unlikely occurence was writtern about considering air passages are not capable of walking and would most likely already be in the ceiling of the bar as too bring fresh air into the bar is important.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Roses are blue Violets are red This isn't humor The Hell's wrong with you?

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What did the wizard say to the man? Wizards aren't real. Thus not able to speak.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What did the audience watching inception say at the end ................ WAT THE FUK

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Knock Knock Who's there? The police. Your husband died.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

the WNBA

thumb_up thumb_down -7

A fat guy!

thumb_up thumb_down -7

A dyslexic man walks into a bar. He orders a drink successfully, pays, and leaves. Three weeks later he dies tragically.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Roses are white, Violets are white, holy shit i can see the light.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

A man walks into a bar and is shot in the face

thumb_up thumb_down -7

How do you make Lady Gaga cry? Make hurtful and upsetting remarks about her person.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What did the rabbi say to the Muslim? I don't know I wasnt there. But it probably had something to do with their varying religions.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What do you call a black woman in a pool? Drowning.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

A batch of muffins is baking in an oven. One muffin says to another... Oh sorry, scratch that, they can't talk; they're f***ing muffins. (CSC)

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops