Whats worse than getting shot in the foot? Watching each member of your family get shot in the foot.

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Why would Bill Clinton like Jess so much? Cause he has a vagina, smells like shit, and has cankles.

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Why did the clown's ballon animal pop? He was a victim in a drive by shooting.

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where would you find a blind man's car? exactly where he left it...

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Justin Beiber is a good singer

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nothing

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what do you call a cat that cant meow? Charlie Sheen.

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What happens if you punch a girl? An equal rights protest.

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What did the bank teller say after the man asked for a pen? Would you prefer black or blue?

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Wanna hear a dirty joke....? A pig rolling in mud!

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What did Ed Gein get at McDonalds? The corpse of a worker he killed by the dumpster and hauled back to his shack to hang up and gut like a deer.

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How do you get a one-armed Polak out of a tree? Get him a ladder and help him down.

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roses are red voliets are blue u actule thought i would cry over you!

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Once upon a time there was a man that was exercising and he pulled a muscle and had to have his arm removed. The end.

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How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? The answer is not definitive and involves several factors including the size of the woodchuck, the woodchuck's teeth, the climate in which that woodchuck lives, and the tenacity of that particular woodchuck at achieving his goal.

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There was a blonde, brunette, and a redhead. They are spending a relaxing afternoon together as a result of being restricted to their heavy therapeutic sessions which they are constantly in need of because all three have been diagnosed with clinic depression since everyone jokes about them so much and in conclusion, they don't see each other very often.

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What do you get when a person and a cat try to have a child of some sort? Nothing because there chromosomes don't match, and there for physically impossible.

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Yo mama's like Darfur: Everyone feels bad for her, but nobody offers any substantial assistance.

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what did the brick say to the other brick? hello. the guy next to the bricks was shocked and went home and killed his wife then later higherd an indian man to give him a lapdance.

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What the corn in the core? The mexican antelope.

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What's red and smells like green paint? Red Paint

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Why did the cat die? Johnny put in the microwave.

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A teenager decides to stay home instead of go to college. His parents are fine with his choice since he is mentally ill.

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i like my coffee like i like my women. without a penis.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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