What did the farmer say to the survivor of the plane crash that just crashed on his land? "Need a band-aid?"

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What's your guys names?

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Grass is green, Clouds are white.

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knock knock Get off my porch I've already called the police.

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What's worse than losing a contact Having a bloody stool

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what do u call a gay dinosaur megasoreass

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Q: What do you get when you throw a piece of bread in the oven? A: 6 million Jews

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What do you get when you cross a black guy and a keyboard? A black guy punctured by a keyboard

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How do you keep an idiot in suspense..............

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whats better than 10 babies nailed to 1 tree? 1 baby nailed to 10 trees whats better than 1 baby nailed to 10 trees? 10 trees nailed to 1 baby

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A: Ask me if I am an Orange. B: "Are you an Orange?" A: No.

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How many blonde chicks does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Two. One to set the house on fire, and the other to call 119.

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A 14 year old boy's mother walks into his room whilst he is naked. The boy requests for his mother to leave; so she apologizes and leaves as the whole incident was rather embarrasing.

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I've got a tip for the ladies. Or if you like I can put the whole thing

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Roses are red, Because they can intrinsically change color through natural dyes.

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have you ever had african food? neither have they

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A black man has just died on your porch. What do you do? Immediately call for medical assistance and perform CPR.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Conscience. Conscience who? Oh, sorry about that Hitler, you wouldn't know who I am.

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Every zoo is a petting zoo if you're not a pussy

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A forty-year-old man forces a young child to strip down and take a shower. The child screams and cries, but the man persists angily. He then carries the child into his bed. The child pleads, "Help! Mom, make him stop!" The mother yells back, "Just listen to him. He's your father and it's past your bedtime." This is a common night-time routine for parents with their first child

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Mohamed is driving a taxi to the airport at 20mph How many pounds of explosives are strapped to his chest?

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why did miles cross the road? Because hes gay

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What bird can lift the most? i do not know, I suggest asking an Ornithologist

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What did the penguin say to the tiger? I'm in the wrong country.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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