What is shit? It's Deshitified already.

How many Stephen Hawkings does it take to screw in a lightbulb? He can't.

What is an offensive term to refer to black people who lived in the time of the Flintstones? n*ggers

ROSES ARE RED, VIOLETS ARE BLUE, I OFFERED YOU SOME CEREAL, MADE OUT OF MY DOGS POO BY VICKY AND RENATA WOHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

Why did the cat scratch the person? Because it's mean.

What do you call a man with no legs, and one arm? Whatever his name happens to be.

Why can't Elvis Presley drive a car backwards? Because he's dead!

How many babys does it take to paint a wall red? 7 and 24 paint brushes cause babys need do overs

what is the difference between a jew and a pizza? Jews are people and regularly attend a synagogue and pizza is and italian food that many people find to be enjoyable to eat

Knock knock. Who's there? Doctor Doctor Who? Doctor Brown, I have your test results, you've HIV positive.

A white man on his way to happens to sit next to a black man the following conversation involves a democrat and a repuplican arguing about obama's current presidentcy and the wallstreet journal the two do not agree on both sujects and part ways...the white man is later brutally murdered in his own house infront of white and children in an unrelated incident. We should all help to stop violence in our local nieghborhoods.

Two horses were discussing their racing records. The first said, "In my whole life I had won ten races." The second horse says, "Well, I've won twelve of those!" A greyhound trotting by chimes in, "Not bragging guys, but in my career, I've won twenty!" "Unbelievable!" exclaimed both horses. "It's a talking dog!"

What does a black man do in the bathroom? He Dookies on bobby

Whats something really annoying? A guy who presses enter too much. hehe

A man walks into a bar. He goes up to the Bar Tender and says, "Hit me with all you got!" The bar tender then ducks down under the bar out of sight. He comes back up with a sledge hammer and viciously murders the man. Blood spews everywhere and many others are brutally murdered shortly afterwards. :)

Q; What is green and eats rocks? A; The green rock eater... Q;What happens when you through a rock straight up in the north pole? A; The green rock eater eats it..

There was a young boy walking to school. and he found a red hairbrush on the ground. He then proceeded to walk to school. During lunch he examined the haircrush and it looked perfectly normal. A few days later, he decided he was bored with the hairbrush and decided to place it in a tree. A girl found the hairbrush. The end. You just wasted 30 seconds of your life. Ha.

What do you say to a black man driving a car? Taxi

I used to have an ugly,black and disabled man as a friend. However, he had a very nasty personality so we are no longer friends.

A burglar broke into a house one night. He picked up a CD player to place in his sack and a strange, disembodied voice echoed from the dark, saying, "Jesus is watching you." He nearly jumped out of his skin, clicked his flashlight off, and froze. When he heard nothing more, he shook his head, clicked the light on, and began searching for more valuables. Just as he pulled the stereo out so he could disconnect the wires, he heard, "Jesus is watching you." Freaked out, he shined his light around frantically, looking for the source of the voice. Finally, in the corner of the room, his flashlight beam came to rest on a parrot. "Did you say that?" he hissed at the parrot "Yep," the parrot confessed, then squawked, "I'm just trying to warn you." The burglar relaxed. "Warn me, huh? Who in the world are you?" "Moses," replied the bird. "Moses?" the burglar laughed. "What kind of people would name a bird Moses?" "Devout Semites," the parrot replied.

Roses are black violets are black I can't hear anything I'm Helen Keller .

-Why did the man sue the train driver after he witnessed his friends death? -Because he was owed a duty of care.

Lol... (wow you made me type lol), "like it is nothing to be ashamed of?" Your eyes are really beautiful, honestly probably the most beautiful eyes I have seen... And no, I am not talking about your bewbs.

derp

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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