A man walks into a bar. He goes up to the Bar Tender and says, "Hit me with all you got!" The bar tender then ducks down under the bar out of sight. He comes back up with a sledge hammer and viciously murders the man. Blood spews everywhere and many others are brutally murdered shortly afterwards. :)

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What is worse than a bee sting? 2 bee stings. What's worse than 2 bee stings? Being eaten by a giant octopus. What's worse than being eaten by a giant octopus? 3 Bee Stings!

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BIG PENIS

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Three Arabian men are on a plane, they stand up, and shout BOMB, BOMB, BOMB! All three have Tourettes.

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How do you stop a baby from crying? You hit it with an axe.

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what did the black guy say to the white guy im black

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How many gay men does it take to screw in a light bulb? One. He was happy to do it.

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How many lollipops does it take to shingle a dog? Purple, because ice cream has no bones.

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knock knock Who's there? The Police! Your under arrest.

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I saw GESUS and SHE's BLACK

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What did the smurf say to the other smurf? Smurf

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Your mother is so stupid that she claimed the pole ran into her.

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Why is there no aspirin in the jungle? Because aspirin is a man-made drug derived from salicylic acid, and it it is this that is extracted from willow bark, which used to be used by Cherokee Americans as a fever-reducer and pain-reliever.

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why were the African, Asian and Mexican men thrown out of the bar the barman was a racist

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Your momma so fat, she's fat

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What did the farmer say to the survivor of the plane crash that just crashed on his land? "Need a band-aid?"

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a man walked into a bar he had no recollection of entering the bar so he exited the bar

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a cat and a duck walk into a pub. the cat enters first and says for the duck to put all of their drinks on his bill. the duck(being a duck)says nothing because ducks cannot speak. therefore the cat shouldnt have been speaking either.

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What do you get when you cross a cat and a dog? A dead cat.

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Jesus, a frog, and Faith Hill walk into a bar. The frog says, "What is this, a joke?"

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What's five miles long and has an IQ of 40? A democrat parade.

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Why was the house painted pink? I dont know, why don't you ask the owner?

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What do you get when you cross a squirrel and a horse? Each animal has a different number of genetic faults therefore such a process would be impossible.

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Why did the man sit on the chair? Because he was tired of standing

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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