What did Helen Keller name her dog? Well i would imagine one of various names for a domesticated animal and she would choose the name based on her likes towards nature or an element of nature, being the educated individual she i would think she may name it base on a person of importance, such as an author or maybe a writer that inspires her.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

One day a man woke up and decided that he was going to do something with his life. He then got a haircut, took a shower and bought a nice new suit. After that he went home and cleaned up his whole house and invited his parents, that were not very close with him, over for dinner.An hour and thirty minutes before his parents got there, he went to the store to pick up some food to prepare for the very important dinner. On the way home he see's a homeless man walking on the side of the road. The man felt bad for him because he was poor so he gave him $10. He then proceeded home to make the dinner. The dinner turned out very well and he went to bed a better man.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

burn baby burn your nanas burning

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Uh, Liz, he is staring at the screen... He says you are right and knows, so he cant get mad, ill trust you both, but it better work, or this one is on me. Oh by the way, yeah he is eating, sorry its late here, and I am the only nurse here about now Ironically this place is full of doctors but they dont seem to give a crap about the man that pays their checks. Doctors said no, Nero said "you are fired" Doctor changes his opinion, glad to see he is taking charge around here, I am just worried about his sleep, he is beginning to halucinate and I doubt any stimulants will help. But fine, ill trust you, sorry, really shaking my boots here, I really do not want to, but this is not about me.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

How do you get really high at home? You climb a ladder

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Knock knock Whos there? A rapist. Go away I'm calling the police!! (The rapist then proceeds to break open the door, beat the woman repeatedly with a baseball bat, and then rapes her)

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What's black and doesn't work? My Blackberry, but luckily it was still under guarantee and the situation was solved swiftly and relatively drama free.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

How do you make a toddler run faster? Chase it with a lawnmower.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Ask me if I am a Truck Are You a Truck No

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What do you call a billionaire who lost a large portion of their net worth? A millionaire.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Did you hear about the mail man without a mail truck? He walked

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What the did the man say to his boss? You are my boss.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What did the muffin say to the cup cake? nothing, muffins can't talk, and cup cakes can't hear.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Your mother is so fat that if she were to fall from a great distance she would hit the ground with more force than that of an average sized individual.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did Billy run away from a mysterious adult? He was playing the iconic game known as tag where 2+ people chase each other in an attempt to tag them.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't because crossing through traffic is very dangerous

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did the maid clean the house? Because that's her job, ya moron.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

why did the teacher quit her job and become a musician? Because her class was very mean to her and growing up she had always wanted to play music

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What did the little boy with cancer get for christmas? Nothing. He was a jew. Jew's don't celebrate christmas.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Knock Knock Who's there? The police. Come out with your hands up.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why are there clocks on stoves? Because it is a convenient way to tell the time.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Two Jewish men walk into a bar...just kidding it was a gas chamber.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

I may be ugly, but I'm also dumb.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

HAHAHAHAH Shut up Andra no one likes you

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops