How do you stop a baby from making bad grades? You throw a javelin at its head.

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Three men walk into a bar. The first guy bought two drinks, the second guy bought three drinks, can you guess what the third guy bought? A tazer.,

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destiny

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Two friends were running late for their school gathering. As they arrived the train station, one friend said 'Quick, we need to catch the train!' The other replied, 'Can't we just get in it?'

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What do you call a praying mantis at your door step? a Jehovah Witness

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My dog got out of its cage So I found it and beat the shit out of my neighbors kid.

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Two dogs are sitting by a fire hydrant. One turns to the other and says absolutely nothing because dogs can't speak.

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When life throws you lemons, duck.

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Carrot fingers

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Your face

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I've lost my electron!! Are you sure? Yes! I'm Positive!

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Knock Knock whose there YOUR MOM

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Why did the old lady have a heart attack? She got raped by a giraffe.

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A horse walks into a bar. Bartender: why the long face Horse: I'm dying of an incurable cancer...

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Smell mop. Smell mop who. *giggle*

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Come on children, don't dawdle.

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Why did sally fall off the swings? She didn't have any arms. Knock Knock, Who's there? Not Sally, she doesn't have any arms.

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In Soviet Russia it's pretty cold.

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What do you call a black kid on a bike? Dirt bike

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willie revilame

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why did the boy die because he got ran over by a tractor

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What do you call a room with an oven and ten Jews in it? A kitchen.

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because at the climax point in the swing, gravity is making a much larger affect on you because you are pulling farther away from the earth as well as positioning your body in a way where it is awkward and unstable to support your body, which greatly increases the chance of you falling off and landing on the ground.

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Let me tell you a story kids about Bill. Now bill seemed like any ordinary guy, he had a job a wife kids and he even coached the little league baseball team for boys. Well he had all the kids come to his house to celebrate the championships,they won, and he accidentally killed a kid while trying to hit a pinata. He had to kill the rest of the children to hide evidence so he killed them all quick and buried them in a 6ft. hole in his basement where they lay for 9 years today.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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