What's green, fuzzy, and can kill you if it fell from a tree? A pool table.

What do you call a needy person? A person whos needs need needs.

What happens when a guy walk into a school and shoots kids? Oh sorry, to soon?

What do you get when you cross a helicopter, elephant, and a rhino? Heliphino

Why do women go to the bathroom together? To clean their filthy pussies.

Q: What's full of different butts and smells bad? A: An ashtray.

Dani Barton is a stupid GIRL

Boy: Why is the sky blue? Man: Because it is

Why does life hand you lemons? Because it sucks enough, so it wants you to have some.

what do you call the head-less man sitting on your porch? By what ever his name is!!

Bigfoot, Santa, a dumb blonde, and a smart blonde all jump off of a cliff. They all reach terminal velocity and at impact at the same time. However, no one really cares.

Why was the man hanging from a tree? He got the Death Penalty

what can you say about a midget dressed as a clown? he had a terrible childhood.

The WPGA tour

Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? SPONGEBO... nope bin laden

Why did Jimmy eat the apple? Because he was obese and needed to eat healthy because his doctor suggested it.

why was the old man cold? ...WHY?

Roses are red violets are blue I can't rhyme fridge

What happened when man put a dog in the blender? He got arrested for Animal abuse

How did the baby die? In a very sad and tragic car accident.

Why couldn't Lucy get her driver's license? Because she has Cerebral Palsy!

What's yellow and shark infested? Shark infested banana pudding.

How to have a cheap party in just 5 steps: 1. Buy 100 McDonald's burgers and give everyone food poisoning 2. Bring out that black serial killer's mask you've been working on. 3. Bring out that sharp knife. 4. Slit everyone's throats. 5. Dance.

What's the difference between a baby and hot dog? I don't put ketchup on my hot dog when I eat it.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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