Your mom is so fat that she enjoys junk food regularly.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Q: Why couldn't the man get laid? A: Women were afraid of his 7 testes and 4 penises.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

vaginas are pretty!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +27

whats funnier than a joke? A: a funnier joke

thumb_up thumb_down +27

what worse the 2 dead kids in a van 3 dead kids in a van

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Why did susie fall off the swing? She didn't have any arms... Why didn't she get up? She didn't have any legs... Why didn't anyone help her? She didn't have any friends. Then she died

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why did suzie fall off the swing? Because She had no arms. Why did suzie fall off again? Becauze Jimmy was trying to snipe her in the head the first time

thumb_up thumb_down +25

A deaf lion tried to kill a zebra. It succeeded.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why did the man die a slow and painful death? Because he kept submitting stupid, recycled anti-jokes over and over; so, I killed him.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why did the man look in the mirror? To see his reflection.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Knock knock Who's there? The Gestapo, time to go to Auschwitz.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why did the boy yawn? Because he was tired.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

why did the girl go into the kitcen? she was preparing a meal for her well safisticated family which had not ate dinner yet that day.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What do you call cat that is on fire? Nigel.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What happened when Mary threw a kettle at Daniel? Daniel was scalded in the facial area and was blinded forever.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What's big, an instrument, has black and white keys, and is located in the bathroom? I don't know. A piano. But why in the bathroom? Don't tell me how to furnish my house.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

why did the monkey fall dead out of the tree? because edward cullen raped it up the arse sooo many times it died from internal bleeding.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What did the football coach say to fire up his team? Nothing. He was not legally allowed to say anything to his team as they were being locked out by the coach's boss, the owner of the team and anything that he said to them could lose him his job.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What does a gay horse eat? Low-energy foods should only be fed to horses who are not regularly being worked and participating in high performance. According to the University of Kentucky's College of Agriculture, energy is vital to horses who need to perform their best as it aids many of the body's functions including muscle contraction, respiration and circulation. Only feed a low-energy diet to an idle horse and feed a high-energy diet to an older or sickly horse and to a working horse.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

"33"

thumb_up thumb_down +23

How many dead babies can fit in a dead horse 11

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Why did the little girl cry? Because she had just witnessed the slaughter of her entire family and friends in front of her eye, leaving her not only peerless and alone, but also with the mental scars which come with witnessing such a harrowing ordeal.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops