HEY WATCH OUT FOR THAT TRUCK! What truck? Weird I could have sworn I saw a truck...

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What's the color of a healthy kidney. I have no f***ing idea.

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A guy walks into a bar and tells the bartender to give him any drink. The bartender gives him the drink and the customer instantly dies. Another person in the bar asked the bartender what dring did you give him. He answered back.....poison

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Why can't black people be in a talent show? Because they'll steal the show.

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Why did the baby boy start crying? He got hit with a toaster

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Kumquats Daffodils Alka-Seltzer Serendipity Dewey Decimal System Buccaneer Avuncular Pantaloons Weasels Alligator Chewbacca Sasquatch

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Your mom is so old that she has a lot of wrinkles because that's what happens to people when they get old.

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Q: Why couldn't the man lick his ice cream? A: Because his body shut down due to the fact that a bullet went straight through his brain. This happened before he could even order his ice cream.

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What's the difference between Wolfjob and a Jew? Wolfjob is attractive.

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anti-joke.com

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i used to think i had the coolest secret handshake with helen keller. then i realized she was talking sh*t about me

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What did the black man say to the asian man? hello.

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what's the difference between a dead baby and a lamborghini? I don't have a lamborghini in my garage!

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A cat walks into a bar and says.......Meow

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there is 500 dicks on the wall how many will choke on? None?? so ur a professional!!!! lol

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What do women and airplanes have in common? They both have cockpits!

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What did Johnny do this wednesday? He went to school to be academically taught to get a high GPA of all the other children so he could go and pursuit his dream so he won't be left at home with a drunk wife and 6 kids with $190,000 in debt from the IRS

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What's the difference between a dead baby and an egg? Ones delicious with bacon, the others an egg.

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Why couldnt the car move? It got blown up by a tank.

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Why did YUR MOM cross the road? To go slap her annoying-ass twelve year old for using "your mom" as an insult.

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How many Jehovah's Witnesses does it take to screw in a light bulb? 2. One to firmly hold the ladder and the other to cautiously screw it in. They are volunteering at the local orphanage and it is wrong to make fun of there religion. We are all different in our own special way.

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Q. What did the wierd kid get for christmas A. A Pokemon diamond edition

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(SAY KATCHUP AND LICKER AFTER EVERY SENTENCE) FOR BREAKFEAST I HAD (KATCHUP AND LICKER) FOR LUNCH I HAD I SEE MY GIRL FRIEND AT THE MALL SO I (KATCH UP AND LICK HER

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I told you it would happen

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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