An American man and a Chinese man have a conversation. The American man asks the Chinese man after a couple of minutes of speaking, "How long have you lived in the United States?" The Chinese man replies, "I moved to the United States when I was ten years old."

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What did the robet say to the centipede? Stop being a centipede. Its funny becuase the robot had no arms.

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What did batman say to robin before they got in the car? Get in the car

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roses are red violets are blue , but i would't know that because u never bring me flowers, you bastard .

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YOUR MUM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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What did the black guy do to his neighbor's car while he was away? Wash it for a for as a favor.

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Pete and repeat were on a boat. Repeat fell off, who was left?

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Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson go camping, and pitch their tent under the stars. During the night, Holmes wakes his companion and says: 'Watson, look up at the stars, and tell me what you deduce.' Watson says: 'Someboby stole our tent.' Holmes and Watson look at each other, shrug and go back to sleep. At least the thief kept their blankets.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. The chicken was ran over before it made it to the other side.

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Why did the old man get wet even though he was using an umbrella? Because it didn't save from falling off the bridge.

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why did the goat go up the ladder? because its ladder goat

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Peaches eat leaches, that is why sneaches live on beaches.

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What's big, grey, and can't climb a tree? A car park.

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Why are there so many black men in the NBA? Because they trained hard and practiced regularly to get there..

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As friend of mine recently told me that he knew my deepest darkest secret. When I asked him what it was, he said that I was too emotionally unstable, and that I would never be ready to settle down. I killed him.

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Old Macdonald had dyslexia IE IE O

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What do you get when you cross Winter Squash, Beets, Ham, Coffee, Spinach, Hexamine, Cadmium, Detergent, and some love? A bowl full of crap.

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What is white and cannot jump? A refridgerator.

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The trick to making a good anti joke is having anticlimactic ending.

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i tried logging into my ipad. turns out, it was an etch a sketch, and i dont own an ipad. also, im out of vodka.

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Roses are Red. Violets are Blue. Faces like yours belong in the Zoo. Don't be mad I will be there too. Not in the gate but laughing at you.

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Why was Sally's dad crying? Because Sally got raped. Why was Sally crying? Her dad raped her.

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what was so bad about hitler? he inadvertently subjected his political officials to death by rope

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I was so fat I went on a diet

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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