Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was the World Chicken Road Crossing Competition.

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What do you call a black guy selling drugs? A pharmacist

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Two muffins are in an oven. After a set period of time, they finish baking and are enjoyed by the family who had made them. Two weeks later the eldest daughter contracts syphilis thanks to numerous sexual partners. She soon dies leaving her parents and brother depressed. Her brother is kidnapped by a viscous child predator and the mother commits suicide. The father gets a job with the New York Yankees. He is eaten by a genetically modified zebra.

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What's funnier than the holocaust? Nothing.

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refridgrator

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What's dry and unpleasant to eat? Sand.

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What did the pillow say to the dragon? Nothing, because pillows don't talk, dragons aren't real and this is a highly improbable circumstance.

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My name is Jacob Mckeand and my penis is as long as Mr. Macs hair.

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What's fat and ugly? Your face ... But only if its fat and ugly

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whats small and tickles? pubic lice

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Why couldn't Austin eat his noodles? He was a horse, and horses don't have hands, silly goose!

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Your mama's so fat, that when she opened the window, wind came in!!!

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How do you make a plumber sad? You kill his family.

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A man was caught by the Aztecs for stealing from their tombs. The Aztecan chief said,"Sometime during the next week I will kill you, but I will do it when you least expect." The man was then given a room. He deduced that he couldn't be killed on the last day, Saturday, or else he would see it coming, so it must be before Saturday. He then deduced that it couldn't be on Friday, because he would expect it to be before Saturday. He used this logic to rule out every other day of the week, therefore the Aztecan chief would never kill him. He was killed on Wednesday.

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5

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why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was scary.. made by Kevin Kool

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My mom farted, now it smells, ewe. My mom just took of her shirt, BONER! My, friends mom took off her shirt, now he has a boner. We both have boners, and it smells bad. This is weird, me and my friend are very similar, except my mom farted and his mom did not. Now I hate my mom. UN-BONER!

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Got tired of McDonalds Jim?

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Wanna hear an anti-joke?

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What was the last thing going through the man's mind who cleans the 90th floor windows on the World Trade Center on 9/11? The 91st floor.

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Q. How do you stop a clown from smiling? A. You hit it in the face with an axe.

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Your so fat that you have a 75% chance increase of dying from congenital heart failure.

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Your momma's so fat in her history class they wrote down what they were doing

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knock knock. who's there myhairs myhairs who myhairs fallen out

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops