Why did the little boy throw his clock out of the window? After hours of searching for the snooze button to no avail, the little boy became so irritated at the incessant ringing of the alarm that he threw it out of his window in a fit of rage. The clock landed on an old woman who was walking twenty stories below. She was immediately killed on impact.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

lets have sex, ok, but itll have to be anal, cuz im a guy xoxox danni

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What is E.T. short For? So he can fit on ship

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Whatsup?! Your grandpas chance of dying.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

why dont black people go on cruises? there not falling for that one again

thumb_up thumb_down -3

If you work at Penn State you might want to skip the annual "bring your kid to work day"

thumb_up thumb_down -3

your mom is so old, she is often confused for your grandmother.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Bra*don Che*ey is tall. Facebook me please... Im desperate

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What do you do when jews take over your country? Invade Poland.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

A duct walks into a bar. The writer meant to write duck and then proceed to make a clever joke but instead a typo was made and a very unlikely occurence was writtern about considering air passages are not capable of walking and would most likely already be in the ceiling of the bar as too bring fresh air into the bar is important.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What's green and has wheels? Grass. I lied about the wheels.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

A blind man walks into a bar. It was a book shop.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Dylan is a person

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Sally sold seashells by the seashore but she didnt make any money of course. seashells on the shore can be picked up off the beach for free

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What do you call a deer with no eyes? A deer. The fact that it has no eyes doesn't change the species.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why did the fireman wear red suspenders? To honor his father, Jonathan "Red" Hoffner, who was tragically killed in the line of duty. While attempting to save 3 small children in a trailer park fire, the elder firefighter suffered 3rd degree burns over 80 percent of his body. "Red" was rushed to a local hospital and lingered for several agonizing days. He began to rally but a careless error by a night nurse led to his unfortunate demise. His son was psychologically unable to wear anything but red suspenders every day for the rest of his life - not only because of his father's death but also because it was he who had maliciously set the fire in the first place.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What happened when a saxophone hit Sally? She had a concussion.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

A horse walks into a convenience store. He grabs a pack of gum, pays the man at the counter, and walks out.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What do you call a big hungry duck? A duck thats hungry and big

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why did Billy drop his ice-cream? He got stabbed multiple times

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Q.What did the homeless kid get from santa? A. Play Doe. Because he was a good boy. Q.what did the Rich Kid get form santa? A Coal. Because he was a bod boy. The rich kid then got mad and threw the coal at the homeless kid hitting him on the head which killed him of enturnaly bleeding.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What do you get if you cross a fairy cake with some boiled parsnips? Fladgemuffin

thumb_up thumb_down -3

An oriental man starts a new job. He is told to go to the Supply cupboard and bring back some stationery.He is gone far too long so his boss sends another man to see what is going on. The oriental man had a fatal stroke in the supply cupboard and was unfortunately dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Sex with people under twelve years/MONTHS? You think I am a pervert or something? friendly r*pist neighbourhood Moral Man: DAMN STRAIGHT I AM! People use to tell me they know I am good on the inside... Joke is on them, I I fool them all by being slightly kind on the outside!

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops