DONT READ THIS. YOU WILL BE KISSED ON THE NEAREST POSSIBLE FRIDAY BYrnTHE LOVE OF YOUR LIFE.TOMMOROW WILL BE THE BEST DAY OF YOUR LIFE. NOWrnYOU'VE STARTED READING THIS. DON'T STOP. THIS IS SO FREAKY.rn1. say your name ten times.rn2.say your mom's name five times.rn3. say your crushes three timesrn4. paste this to four other groups.rnIf you do this, your crush will kiss you on the nearest Friday.rnBut if you read this and do not paste this, then yournwill have very bad luck.rnSEND THIS TO 5 GROUPS IN 143 MINUTES. WHENrnYOU'RE DONE PRESS F6 AND YOUR CRUSH'S NAME WILL APPEAR IN BIG LETTERSrnON THE SCREEN. THIS IS SO FREAKY BECAUSE IT ACTUALLY WORKSrnrnrn

thumb_up thumb_down -37

More mindfuck: Your school is betraying you edition. How are you going to feel good about yourself, if you have to UNDER STAND everything you learn? Moral: If you dont get it, you are not ready.

thumb_up thumb_down -37

I stepped into the bathroom and began to take a shower. Then, I panicked. I was so thirsty, and I did not take the advantage to drink some water before I stepped into the bathroom. But then I realized: "Wow, I am so silly. I am standing under the shower, so I could easily just expedite my washing and drying, exit the bathroom, get dressed, and grab something to drink from the kitchen!" Then I showered quickly and got something to drink.

thumb_up thumb_down -37

What do you call a black airline pilot? Captain, you big racist.

thumb_up thumb_down -37

Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Madeline McCan

thumb_up thumb_down -37

2 guys are in a bar joking and having a good time. One guy looks to the other and says, "So...HOWS your wife?" The man replies "...She died in a horrible car accident." The man's friend then says "...I am sorry to hear that.." "Yeah I know I wish that God damn rat wasn't in the road goddamn fucker"

thumb_up thumb_down -39

How did they wake up Lady Gaga? They p-p-poked her face p-p-poked her face......!

thumb_up thumb_down -39

Did you hear about the eskimo and the pregnant lady? The eskimo got the pregnant lady pregnant.

thumb_up thumb_down -39

There were three people on an airplane. A Mexican, an American and an Italian. The plane chrashed and they all died.

thumb_up thumb_down -41

What do you call a dog that's having a stroke? An emergency animal hospital.

thumb_up thumb_down -41

If I am from Texas, where are you from? You know the answer? HOLY SH*T! YOU ARE A GENIUS!

thumb_up thumb_down -43

How do you kill a blonde? You stab her many times in the ear with a fork......Then finsih her off with a spoon. No knives those hurts

thumb_up thumb_down -43

Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, due to the lack of details, there could be many reasons, such as the possibility that there was a cornfield on the other side, he got scared by a loud noise behind him and ran across the street, or just plain old curiosity, but whatever it may be, right now, we do not know the cause.

thumb_up thumb_down -49

How do you finish your homework? Get your dog to eat it.

thumb_up thumb_down -51

My dog has no nose! Then how does he smell? Terrible!

thumb_up thumb_down -53

First speaker: "why are there so many anti-jokes about something walking into a bar!?!? Second speaker: "there are only a couple thousand of them." First speaker: "it is getting so damn annoying!" Second speaker: "Well, that's too bad for you" The first speaker proceeds in stabbing himself with a knife while laughing hysterecly. First speaker: "ha ha ha ha" Second speaker "emo."

thumb_up thumb_down -57

Yo momma is so fat that we are incredibly concerned for her health.

thumb_up thumb_down -59

what do u call a long dik gay guy Gay Dickerson

thumb_up thumb_down -65

What did the cat say to the elephant? Meow.

thumb_up thumb_down -75

Why do black people enjoy watermelon? Because it tastes good.

thumb_up thumb_down +58

planned on writing you all an antijoke decided i wouldn't.

thumb_up thumb_down +58

i am an inbred jew who likes penis up my bum ~Nathan Barras

thumb_up thumb_down +50

Yo mama is so fat that she has to buy plus size clothes because small size clothes would be inappropriate for her to wear.

thumb_up thumb_down +50

How many dogs does it take to screw in a light bulb? Dogs do not have aposable thumbs therefore they cannot screw in light bulbs

thumb_up thumb_down +46

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops