why was the pen lonely? because it didn't have a pen pall

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What did the guy who walked into a bar say? Ouch

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So there are 5 people on a plane the president, a movie star, and man who is on the verge of making world peace, the smartest man in the world, and the pope the piolt has a heart atack at and the plane will crash soon there are only 4 parachutes. So the first is Obama and he saysI won a Nobel piece prize and I run American see ya later and he takes the parachute next Steven hawking says sory pope Im taking this because I don't believe in God and black holes are cool so he takes the parachute and jumps out. Next Charlie Sheen says I need to entertain people and keep the drug dealers in business so he. Takes the parachute and jumps out. Then Francis turns to the hippie and says if you achive world peace it may help eliminate some poverty so you take the last paratute and jump out then the hippie says in return no its OK Steven Hawking took my back back. When they land they decide to serch for Steven's body and they find nothing. You see Steven Hawking had taken his own paratute with him and took the Hippies backpack to sell it and make some money

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knock knock who's there? i eat mop I eat mop who?

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Whats black and white with red all over? A dead panda

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I was the bigger man in the argument. The person I was arguing with is now unconscious.

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Grammer is very important

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What did the homosexual give in his secret box? important papers from work.

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Knock-knock. Who's there? Doorbell repairman. ym

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What did the banker say to the other banker? We're both bankers!

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knock knock Come in!!!

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What's brown and sticky? Caramel.

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Anti-joke.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? John Simons. This joke lacks a punchline. Yes, yes it does.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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Whats the difference between a jewish man wearing a fedora and glass of almond milk? Ones a glass of almond milk.

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What did Susie get for Christmas? AIDS.

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I've had Alzheimer's for as long as I can remember... So since yesterday.... CHAYOTE ASTRONAUT SPACE SAY WHAT?!?!?!

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What's the difference between a whale and an elephant

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you are a åsshole :)

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Why did samantha die? Because she had cancer.

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What did the skeleton say when he was horny? Nothing. Skeletons are not living and therefore cannot be horny.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm random but can still rhyme Hatsune Miku

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You know what they say about men with big feet? Big penis.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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