You are so dumb that you receive poor grades in school.

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Dane Cook makes a joke.

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My cat just died.

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OMG I JUST FOUND THE GREATEST WEBSITE YOU SHOULD TOTALLY CHECK IT OUT OMG ITS http://anti-joke.com/submit

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What do you call a blonde at the beach? A dipthong.

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Whats 9 plus 10? 19

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whats white and sticky? a white stick

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the person who wrote 1 under me is gay

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When you aren't feeling well, you should see a doctor like this: https://encrypted-tbn2.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcS5u4lryU5PzmLUKCGEKZgDWMeQ_96VLEKFGu7Wvk-4M7UXHkOXBw

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why couldnt the african child eat enough food? he didnt have a mouth.

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Whats worse than a bee sting? Two bee stings. Whats worse than two bee stings? Three bee stings. Whats worse than three bee stings? The holocaust. Whats worse then the holocaust? Four bee stings.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the street? A: Because that was the direction it was headed.

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hows your wife she died 7 years ago really mine too

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give me a gun or i will shoot you i dont know what with but i will kill you so run run or i will come and get you

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What's green and fuzzy, and if it falls out of a tree, it'll kill you? A pool table.

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Why did the man drive a van? So he could keep the stuff he stole.

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Why did the black man cross the road? He was going to meet up with his friend who happened to be Irish.

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What did the businessman do to get a promotion? He traded oral sex for his male bosses kind heart...

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What is white and can't climb trees? Toothpaste.

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Yo mamma so fat she has to have anti biotics to keep her alive

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what do you call a girl that just took 15 loads to her face? sasha grey.

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Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

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Why did the pumpkin stop using the jack hammer? Pumpkins cannot use power tools since they are nothing but an orange gourd. But, [for sport] say this ‘pumpkin’ was incarnate; one could assume he was done with his demolition work. He then would return the portable drill to the rental facility and get his deposit back.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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