-Knock Knock -Who's there? -It's just Linda from nextdoor. -Oh hi Linda come on in.

What's red and looks like a bucket? A red bucket. What's blue and looks like a bucket? A red bucket in disguise.

Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She has no arms.

Chuck Norris never shows emotion!!!... because he is a pragmatic person and thinks in a more logical manner.

Why was the emo kid sad? Because he gets raped by his dad every night

Wow you look beautiful in that picture..... Let me see your tits. Sorry, I thought I was still texting.

what does 1 out of 15 people get cancer

A Jew finally tipped He was in a canoe

What was John Lennon's last hit? The pavement.

What's the hardest thing to do while masturbating? Having sex.

Why didn't the TV turn on? Nobody switched it on.

how many large people can you fit in a bath tub ... 1/16

Why do ducks fly south for the winter? because its to far to waddle

Why did the girl cry? i took her happy meal.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. He flapped his wings, hovered, and the road crossed beneath him.

Why didnt suzy give mary i high five? because i cut off her hand

What do you call it, when a jew makes fun of a black guy? Racism.

Little molly says she wants to have a baby when she grows up because her little baby brother died of ta-sacs 6 months after birth.

What's blck and blue and doesn't like sex? The ten year old in my car.

What did the captain say to the priest? We're on a boat.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. -Knock Knock. -Who's there? -Not Sally.

What did the lady say to the boy who's parents just died? Haha, your parents just died.

roses are red, violets are blue, hes for me not for you, if by chance you take me place, ill take my fist, and smarsh your face.

What do you call a middle-eastern man flying a plane? A pilot

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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