What did the Chinese man say to the black man? I'm Part of my Asian herritage.

What is the crunchiest part of a Vegetable? It depends if by Vegetable you mean the food or the disabled human incapable of carrying out simple, daily tasks, in which case this joke would be referring to canibalism.

Horse walks into a bar... Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

A jew, a mexican, a priest, a polock, a rabbi, a black guy, a white guy, an alien, a rooster, a duck, a horse, a chicken, a carrot, a chinaman, a plumber, a blond, and a christian are all examples of descriptive nouns.

why does chuck norris not have a middle name? because his parents didn't want him to have one.

why should you not shake a baby? because if it dies it wouldnt know that its parents hate them.

How many blondes does it take to finish a math test? 1 if she isn't copying.

Q:what do you call someone who spends 7 hours a day playing video games? A: Someone who takes pride and joy from gaming

Why did the girl drop her sucker? she was hit by a truck!

why did the chicken cross the road? because he frickin wanted to!!!!!!

What do you call a man with a spade in his head? ...An innocent, family orientated murder victim.  X

"Why did Jim Jones put cyanide in the People's Temple Flavor Aid?" Because he understood that adding sugar would be bad for their teeth.

Your mother is of a healthy weight and a pleasure to be around.

it was a black guy a white guy a chinese guy a french guy an arab guy an irish guy and a juncky that was too much for a joke

Did you know that there is a species of rodent capable of jumping higher than an average three-story building? This is due to its muscular hind legs and the fact that the average three-story building cannot jump.

a gay man got shot outside his house even though he was just checking the male get it checking the male

Why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side... (other side as in the afterlife, for it committed suicide by crossing the road)

How do you make a tissue dance? Tissues are inanimate objects, they cannot dance and thinking otherwise is foolish.

Q. Why did Jimmy fall off his bike? A. Because he had alzheimer's and couldn't remember how to ride a bike.

Y didnt the grandma go to christmas? She died on thanksgiving

what did Cinderella say when she got to the ball? "Grggglgluglguggarglegerrrllggglge"

How do u save a black person from drowning? Take ur foot off the back of there head

Roses are red, You're a failed abortion, Happy Valentines Day. :D

How many cops does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None, they just beat the night since its black

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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