What do you call a fish with no "i's"? A blind fish.

One day there was 2 black guys in hoodys with knives in there hand. They tapped me on the shoulder and took my groceries. They then made me a jam sandwich and went on there way

Do you know why, when geese fly south for the winter, one side of the V is always longer than the other? Because there are more birds on that side.

Why did Jerry Sandusky rape little boys? Because his penis was hard and he needed to get his nut off quick

What's worse than seven babies in a trashcan? Not much.

what happens when a mexican makes love to an octopus? It makes a freaking weird looking animal

What do you call a black man on the moon? A miracle

"DUDE! THERE IS A KNIFE IN YOUR LEG!" "SERIOUSLY!"

You know whats funny about 9/11? Nothing.

What did Tarzan shout when he saw the elephants coming? "Here come the elephants!"

96 right now there mad at each other but pretty soon it will look like this 69

What did the American WWII soldier say to the Feudal-era samurai? Nothing, because the two lived on completely different continents and in completely different time periods.

Why did the chicken cross the road? His family was experiencing financial troubles, and needed money. He tried applying for many jobs, but they just didn't quite work out. After ending up in the drug business to support his family, a deal went bad and he was shot, landing him in the hospital. The night his family arrived to check on him, the same shooter made his way to his room, and murdered his wife and 3 children, and somehow managed to evade police. Months after this incident, Ralph, the same chicken who was in the hospital and witnessed his family's murder, was finally released. He had nothing to live for, nothing to look forward to in the future. He took up alcohol abuse for some time, until realizing what truly had to be done. He began tracking down his family's killer, and with each day spent, he became closer and closer to discovering the dealer's whereabouts. One day, he finally figured out who it was. As he arrived at the killers' home, he took one last deep breath, then stormed in. After fighting through many of the dealers' body-gaurds, Ralph finally reached the notorious drug dealing murder, Froghorn Leghorn. As a bloody battle ensued, it was clear who the winner would be.. As Ralph staggered out of the destroyed home, bloodied, yet victorious, he realized something. All the tracking, all the killing, all the bloodshed he had created, was all in vain. He realized that taking Froghorn's life didn't, and wouldn't, bring his family back. Finding himself dumbfounded, he began to trot, head down, through the field where the bad drug deal happened, almost a year ago now. He took one last deep breath, looked at the stars, and took his first step on the road. This was it he decided, he was finally going to reunite with his family again once more. As the headlights raced towards him, he heard his family in unison whisper to him "You're finally home Ralph, you're finally home."

What did the one Lame say to the other Lame? I don't know, what did you say?

Whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? Watching your mum get sandwiched by two black guys...

why did the boy loose his job.... because he was only 14,dont know how he got it in the first place Chuckles

What do you call white people on a bench? NBA What do you call black people on a bench? RTA

So, two black guys walk into a bar... And they pay their tab and couldn't have been more courteous

life is like a rapist. sometimes they're nice other times, they ram you in the ass.

What's white and sticky.... Jizz

What do you call a black man at KFC? A customer.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It felt like it, no particular reason. Why did the hippo cross the road? Same reason as the chicken. Why did the Fred cross the road? He was with animal control, and a chicken and hippo had just been reported to cross this dangerous stretch of highway.

Why did the boy who didn't do his homework fall out off a tree? Because his overly obsessive mom threw a rock at him.

Q: What's not funny and has three wheels? A: The Holocaust, I lied about the wheels and not being funny.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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