Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? Cue annoying little kids saying WHAT!!!!!!!!! A: To check out all the chicks

Why hasn't little Johnny ever had a clown at his birthday party? Johnny is an underprivileged Hispanic member of the community.

Why are people in Africa dying? because the majority of them have a lack of food and fresh water which effects their health.

A man walks into a clothing store, he calls his wife, buys a shirt, and leaves.

Knock Knock. (No answer) Knocker: " I guess the resident of this home isn't home at this hour."

America

What's big and purple? Barney

Whats black and white and red all over? Genital Warts...

We are not even in the same country, and my eye becomes infected two times a minute or something so I wont be going anywhere. I mean, if you are some guy trying to be a girl in order to screw with me, let me first of all thank you for our exchange of ideas and concepts, and then say that if you are a guy, that likes other guys, then... Well, lets just say that if you are a man, that I don`t speak with men in general, takes away time I can spend with the ladies.

what is bad about being a black jew? you have to sit in the back of the oven

What's blue and smells like red paint Blue paint.

What's the difference between a duck? One of its legs are the same.

How do you describe a cranky rapist? Cranky and rapist

What do you get when you cross a taco with a a bungee cord? An inedible taco.

Well, its allright then, just tired that is all, leave it be, I mean what if your wife sees it? What will she think?

knock knock whos there? your dr you have cancer

Did you hear about the guy who fed his dog his baby? No Oh

Q:how do you fit 100 jews in a car? A:2 in the front 3 in the back and the other 95 in the ashtray

Three men are stranded, mid-ocean, in a small rowboat. They realize quickly that their imminent demise is slowly creeping into the forefront of their consciousnesses. Just as all hope seem to be lost, one man noticed an island covered in luscious foliage about five hundred yards away. A problem reared it's head as it became apparent that an unrelenting riptide was dragging the boat further and further from the shore and, in turn, salvation. It became further apparent that the men would have to abandon their rickety rowboat and swim the rest of the way. The first man bravely jumps into the vast uncertainty of the ocean and attempts to swim to shore. He is met by a large shark that promptly severs his arm from his body. A bloody mess, he manages to touch down on the sandy beach. The second man, more reluctantly, also jumps in. He balanced his chances: "100% death in the boat vs. uncertainty in the ocean." Like the first man, the second man meets the shark's vicious bite. His leg is severed and he too drags himself, bloody, to the warm embrace of sand and freedom. The third man, sure that he would be bitten also, jumps into the ocean and swims to shore. Alas! The third man arrived on the island unscathed and completely fine. Perplexed, the first two men asked the third why the shark did not attack him. The third man simply smiled and replied..."what do you expect me for, a typewriter?"

Why did the chicken cross the road? AIDs.

what looks about a computer which has two wheels? a bike. i lied about the computer...

what's the worst way to fall asleep? sad. it makes you lose sleep.

Q: what did the man with no eyes get for Chrismas? A: Reading glasses

What happened to the boy who crossed the road without looking both ways? He was abducted by aliens.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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