Bill goes and buys 45 watermelons, what does he have? 45 watermelons.

Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

Why didn't Sebastian get out of the forest? Because he got brutally murdered by a big bad wolf

Q: Wanna hear a dirty joke? A: A kid fell in the mud.

Q:What did the frog say to the mailman? A:Nothing theres no mail on Sunday's.

Aye I heard somethin about yo mom WAT!!!!!!!!! She a bop

Why did the car stop working. The owner was unable to pay the outrageous price for gasoline and was forced to ride a bicycle to and fromvwork every day. Over the course of several months without being run, the engine seized and was forever broken.

Some potential names for Justin Beiber's next album: Headache Wailing and Screaming Eardrum Rapist Anger Half Price Indescribable Out of Print April Fools The Sounds of Hell Torture Ear Basher

A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks "What can I get for you?" The man replies, "a drink"

What did the octopus say to the lion? Nothing, because the likely hood of a lion and an octopus meeting is incredibly slim, as an octopus is a sea creature, and a lion isn't. A lion and an octopus cant even communicate with each other anyway, so even if they did come across each other they wouldn’t be able to talk. Octopi are also anti-social creatures by nature so I can say with some confidence that the lion and the octopus will not have a convocation. Written By JAMES!

Jim just got laid off at the office. He believes his life is going to hell, so he commits suicide. His wife then later was blamed for his death because they were having many arguments. She was sentenced to life and slowly rotted in prison for the rest of her life. Their children then are moved around from foster home to foster home and they grow up to be drug dealers.

What's the name of Hellen keller's dog? She doesn't have a dog, she's blind and deaf and would not be able to give it the adequate amount of care. Additionally, it's morally reprehensible to make fun of Helen Keller.

Why did the chicken cross the road? - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - I lied, it was a goat.

Roses are red Violets are blue This poem sucks Because violets are purple

What did Little Tommy get for chirstmas? An explanation that Santa is a lie.

Roses are red Violets are blue I have schizophrenia And so do I..

Why did Sara fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock Who's there Not Sara

Why can't a cat fly Because it doesn't have wings.

Roses are red Violets are blue I tryed to hang myself But my neck qad to fat

When someone calls me ugly, I run up and hug them, because I know how tough life is for the visually impaired.

What did the man say before he killed himself? I am going to kill myself

Roses are red Violets are blue I'm bipolar NO I'M NOT!!

Why is Lindsay Lohan out of prison? No, I'm asking.

What do gay horses eat? Horse dick.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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